Quips& Quotes

“I travelled out west on the motorway and all the new roadworks and bridges for the Waterview tunnel reminded me of Spaghetti Junction. We should name it ‘Spaghetti Western’.” – NZ Herald letter to the editor

“Some cause happiness where they go; others, whenever they go.” – Oscar Wilde

“There is still no cure for the common birthday.” – John Glenn

“Last week was the annual White House Easter Egg Roll. There was an appearance by that very special visitor, someone who only shows up to the White House once a year – Melania Trump.”

– UK comedian James Corden

“No pressure, no diamonds.” – Thomas Carlyle

“The scientific community is still trying to clone sheep. Great. Just what we need. Sheep to look more alike.”

– Dave Barry

“Any chance we could fit Kristine Bartlett alongside Kate Sheppard on that $10 note?” – Hilary Barry on the pay-equity agreement

“There is huge merit in talking about your issues and the only thing about keeping it quiet is that it’s only ever going to make it worse.” – Prince Harry on his mental health after losing his mother

“If you’re calling him, just leave a message after the high moral tone.” – Charles Kennedy on former UK party leader Paddy Ashdown