CELEBS’ BUCKET LISTS
Famous faces reveal their dreams and darkest moments
Most of us have a “bucket list” – a bunch of stuff we want to tick off before it’s too late. But all too often, things are left unfulfilled. Tash and Triny Bell’s mum Shirley knew her time was short and she completed as many items as possible before she passed away. Inspired by her brave approach, Mercy Hospice has teamed up with a few well-known faces to help inspire your own list – and you can even win it!
It’s easy to get lost in the hustle and bustle of life and its routines, leaving the things you really want to do to fall further down the to-do list. But for twins Tash and Triny Bell (30), living in the now has never been more important.
It’s been six months since the sisters farewelled their beloved mum Shirley (64), who battled cancer. Tragically, they also lost their dad to a sudden heart attack in 2014.
But in spite of the devastating loss they have faced, they are grateful. The time they got to spend with their mum, helping her to tick a few things off her bucket list, is something they both treasure deeply.
“How do you describe Mum?” Tash sighs as she begins to talk about the “fiercely independent and stoic” Shirley. “She loved bridge, tennis and being a grandma – absolutely besotted, she was,” Tash chuckles.
Shirley was diagnosed with multiple myeloma in December 2010, a cancer of the plasma cells usually occurring in the bone marrow. Despite outliving the doctors’ estimates of her lifespan, her condition went downhill in 2016.
Realising her health was deteriorating, Shirley wanted to start doing the things she had been putting off, Triny recalls. And so began a sort of bucket list. “We didn’t view it as a bucket list as such but that’s what it ended up as,” says Triny. “It was really, ‘What big or small things did Mum want to do?’”
Tash explains, “Bucket lists don’t have to contain big, extravagant things. For us, it was about creating memories, which is why Triny and I took turns taking Tuesday and Thursday afternoons off work to spend time with Mum.”
Shirley took a trip to the US to visit her eldest daughter Jorja, visited her best friend in Christchurch and her mum’s grave, and took a long-awaited trip to Stewart Island. “She went and did what she could and absolutely loved it,” says Triny.
One of Shirley’s biggest dreams was to visit Africa, but because of the difficulties with travel, she improvised. “Mum was quite impulsive,” Triny laughs. “She’d heard of the Jamala Wildlife Lodge in Canberra – it’s a private zoo that allows you to stay overnight in the exhibits with the animals. She asked us what we were doing for Queen’s Birthday Weekend and three days later, we were off to Australia!”
Only two weeks after the trip, Shirley was admitted to Mercy Hospice, where Triny and Tash say their mum received incredible support. “They took good care of all of us. Something Mum still wanted to happen was family dinners,
so the staff helped us set up a table with their best china and we put on a lovely lunch.”
Tash adds, “Because Mum was sick for so long, we actually got the chance to prepare. Our relationship grew, we talked to her about her life... she’s even knitted for our future children.”
For Tash and Triny, their journey with their mum has opened their eyes to focusing on their own bucket lists. Says Triny, “Mum and Dad always talked about White Island, so Tash and I booked tickets to go and see it with our partners.” Tash adds, ”People think their parents will always be around, so we are very lucky we got to have that time with Mum.”