Talking about feelings a lifeline

When Brook McFarlane thinks about the death of his stepfather, he knows it didn’t have to happen.

McFarlane, a Glenfield resident, can draw on his experience as a Lifeline volunteer to understand that a lot of people in suicidal situations just want their situation to end, not their own life.

His stepfather committed suicide in 2010 after being on the verge of bankruptcy.

‘‘There were financial problems and he was struggling with that, but he never really talked about how he was feeling,’’ McFarlane said. ‘‘It didn’t need to happen. Looking back, you’ve always got 20/20 vision at what could’ve happened and how it could have been better.’’

After his stepfather died, McFarlane went through a period of depression. ‘‘It threw my whole world out of balance,’’ said the 27-year-old, former Westlake Boys High School student. He got through the troubled times with support of a therapist and his mother, who is a counsellor.

McFarlane, eventually, decided he wanted to give something back and, at the start of this year, started volunteering for 24/7 helpline Lifeline Aotearoa.

Lifeline volunteers talk to a whole variety of people, including those who are suicidal. Each crisis call was monitored by a supervisor, who follows-up with the caller. McFarlane admitted some calls were really tough.

‘‘Sometimes you get off the phone and think ‘I need a sleep’. But the supervisors always, always, always make sure you’re okay. They will take you into another room and de-brief.’’

While it can be tough, McFarlane said he continued to volunteer because it improved his communication skills and he got joy out of helping others.

‘‘I feel good doing it; I feel like I have an impact in a positive way on people’s lives.’’

But McFarlane was concerned about the long-term viability of Lifeline, after it lost a Government contract for a helpline. ’’At the moment they run completely on donations. We need volunteers and donations as well.’’

McFarlane, a marketing assistant, said he wanted to keep volunteering with Lifeline and helping people through troubled times.

WHERE TO GO FOR HELP Call Lifeline’s helpline 24/7 on 0800 543 354.

Call or text ‘Need to Talk?’ on 1737.

DENISE PIPER/STUFF Lifeline volunteer Brook McFarlane, from Glenfield, says help is just a phone call away.