Silence contributes to violence
I know some people turn off when they hear the words ‘family violence’.
We all know that it’s been given plenty of publicity in recent years, with some high-profile campaigns, but let’s face it, this is an issue that is not going to go away on its own.
Sadly we are part of the problem, especially when you consider the following facts.
❚ New Zealand has the worst rate of domestic violence in the developed world.
❚ Last year, police responded to a family violence incident every five minutes.
❚ Each year an average of 10 children are killed by a family member.
❚ Sadly, only about 23 per cent of family violence incidents are believed to be reported.
By staying quiet, we contribute to family violence in New Zealand. So what exactly is it?
It is not just physical. It also includes sexual, psychological or emotional abuse, as well as financial abuse. Family violence does not discriminate; it can happen to anyone regardless of gender, age, ethnicity, and socioeconomic status.
It can happen in any close relationships whether that’s an intimate relationship between parents and children, siblings, flatmates or towards the elderly. Many signs and symptoms of these kinds of violence can be hard to detect by outsiders. It can even be hard for the victims themselves to tell whether what they are facing is family violence or not.
If you are on the receiving end of psychological violence the perpetrator may be isolating you from friends and family, stalking or checking up on you unnecessarily, blaming or criticising you or using your children or pets to threaten you.
Psychological abuse is the most damaging abuse for children, affecting them right throughout their lives.
If you are experiencing sexual abuse you may be forced to have sex, be touched in a way you don’t want, or be frequently accused of sleeping with other people.
Financial abuse includes someone taking your money or property, running up debts in your name and controlling you through your money.
Neglect also meets the abuse definition and can occur when the perpetrator is not providing a dependant with food, clothing, comfort, safety or medical treatment.
So let’s take the lead, Taranaki, and do something about it.
If you think you or someone you know might need help, check out our website where you will find a list of agencies available to help http://www.taranakisafefamilies.org.nz/
If you are interested in working with Taranaki Safe Families Trust to raise awareness and receive training around family violence prevention, contact me on 06 759 1492.
Katy Wilson is the Taranaki Safe Families co-ordinator.
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