Your vital questions answered ahead of election day

Election promise is defined as an indication that some course of action may or

may not be carried out

SOME questions about voting day have been sent to this column and it seemed churlish to ignore them. A more pretentious column would call them FAQ but there is always a danger of an offensive pronunciation with that acronym so we will simply call them questions.

1. Is it compulsory to vote in New Zealand?

No. Citizens and permanent residents who are aged 18 years and over are required to enrol to vote but voting itself is not compulsory. This is based on the marriage laws of this country. While it is compulsory to register a marriage it is not compulsory to undertake the physical consummation of such a union. Forced fornication has never been part of the New Zealand political system and nor has the obligation to attend a school room smelling of Marmite sandwiches and be thrust into a small enclosed space smelling of the nervous emissions of previous visitors.

2. Why is voting compulsory in Australia?

It is part of that country’s convict heritage. If left to their own devices Australians tend to do very little, a trait seen not only in their politics but also in their rugby. After earlier low turnouts of 60%, voting was made compulsory in the 1925 election which had a turnout of 90%.

3. If the ballot is secret, how do Australian officials know you have not voted?

They don’t. If they think they’ve caught someone, returning officers send an offence notice with a $20 penalty (about a third of the value of the average parking ticket). The odd troublemaker has ended up in jail but with a turnout of 90%, the Australian system at least beats New Zealand’s 76%. Mind you, even a cursory examination of the MPs actually elected by the impressive 90% turnout suggests the Australian system is of no benefit to the country at all.

4. Should I take any notice of election promises in making my decision?

No. ‘‘Election promise’’ is defined as ‘‘an indication that some course of action may or may not be carried out’’. However, should a candidate promise to give you a lift to the polling booth then you can assume the lift will be given. Such a scenario is described as ‘‘enlightened selfinterest’’ but remember, there is no obligation to vote for the person who gave you the lift. This is sometimes described by party campaign managers as the most frustrating aspect of election planning.

5. This is my first election. What are the dress code requirements?

There is no formal dress code, but you should certainly be dressed.

6. If it’s a secret ballot, how can they find out you’ve defaced the voting paper with an obscenity?

Easy. You have a number beside your name on the roll. That number is on your voting form. Thus ‘‘secret’’ may not be the most appropriate word to describe the system but at least it helps to catch the obscenity perverts. Some disabled people are obliged to vote with the assistance of a deputy returning officer who, of course, must know the voter’s voting preference. However, deputy returning officers are not permitted to write obscenities.

7. I am an 80yearold who bases my vote on a careful examination of the issues and the policies of the candidates. My grandson is a 20yearold layabout, high on drugs and antisocial behaviour. Each of us has one vote. Is this the best electoral system we can devise?

Absolutely. Your grandson probably supports Winston Peters.

8. Can I take a punt at the TAB on the election day results?

Not yet, as the TAB is restricted to sport and a bunch of scruffy MPs can hardly claim to be the All Blacks. However, TAB betting on nonsporting events may be introduced next year. Betting on the election is available through other online book makers and it may be a good way of adding interest to what can be a pretty dull event.

9. Over the years I have voted for all the major parties (not all at the same time, of course). Yet, I’ve never voted for the winning party. Why is this?

They all hate you. They all hate floating voters. Get a grip this year and vote for the party you supported last time.

10. I have already cast a special vote but just yesterday a candidate for another party did me a very special favour, well above the duty expected of an electoral candidate. Can I change my vote?

Not right away. But in three years you could be in with another chance. Good luck.

Jim Sullivan is a Patearoa writer.