Otago Daily Times

Fears phone use excessive

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WELLINGTON: More than a third of New Zealanders are concerned their partners are spending too much time on their smartphone.

A 2degrees survey showed 39% of 2200 respondent­s aged older than 16 believed the amount of time being spent on their smartphone­s was affecting the quality of their relationsh­ip.

The survey also found more than half of New Zealanders choose their phone or computer if they have to deliver bad news, but 43% of respondent­s felt guilty about this.

Relationsh­ip expert Dr Anna Martin said some people would consider this rude and the problem with texting is that it did not give the full enriched experience.

‘‘So when you send a text, you’re not getting to see the other person’s nonverbal communicat­ion, so you’re missing out seeing that person’s hurt, or they’re not seeing you say a full apology, so it leaves the other person feeling less validated.’’

Relationsh­ips between the grandparen­ts and grandchild­ren are becoming more distant and 49% of Kiwi grandparen­ts say they no longer know how to meaningful­ly connect with their grandchild­ren. Both parties say they would like to communicat­e more often with each other.

More than half of all respondent­s’ main form of communicat­ion with their parents is via phone, text or messenger app but nearly onequarter of parents believe that smartphone communicat­ion is affecting their relationsh­ip with their children.

Dr Martin said there was an ‘‘iPhone effect’’ when people were with someone who was on their smartphone.

‘‘Even just the presence of an iPhone leaves the other person feeling less prioritise­d, so it’s not helpful for any relationsh­ip to have that happening.’’

Dr Martin said these days we are connected 24/7 and often it is because of work.

She said although it was important to recognise technology’s importance it was also important to have technology­free rituals.

‘‘Meal times, you know game nights with family, putting phones away for certain periods of times, curfew times, just recognisin­g that we’re always going to have the technology involved in our lives but make those rituals within families.’’

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