Daughter can give dad wakeup call
There’s nothing like a daughter to make Dad see the world differently, writes
COULD Woke Dad be a thing, when it comes to gender equality? Research from the London School of Economics says that having daughters could make fathers less sexist as they become more aware of the challenges facing women — something called the ‘‘mighty girl’’ effect.
The study, conducted annually between 1991 and 2012, tracked responses from 5000 men and 6300 women with a child living with them. The researchers found that fathers’ views weren’t necessarily fixed during their own formative years; that those with schoolage daughters could change their attitudes, becoming more likely to disagree with traditional statements — ‘‘a husband’s job is to earn the money‘‘; ‘‘a wife’s job is to look after the home and family’’ — than those without daughters.
This is intriguing for those of us who have long believed that having a daughter is one of the best educations a man can have. Not that fathers of sons, or nonfathers, are inherently sexist. The study excluded men who were ‘‘feministminded’’ to begin with and most parents would agree that children of either sex change everything. Women can be enlightened by daughters, too. This sometimes reveals itself in the uncomfortable insight that, along the way, it might have been an idea to try to look out for ourselves, as much as we’re now determined to look out for our daughters. Still, it’s struck me before how daughters can be a powerful gamechanger for some fathers.
In terms of sex and relationships, it seems to operate on a twotier basis. A shamefaced recognition of their past attitudes and behaviour, twinned with molten dread their daughters could meet someone who, to put it bluntly, thinks and acts like they did. That’s where all those nervous daddaughter jokes about ‘‘knowing how their boyfriends’ minds work’’ come from, not to mention the plots of films such as Meet the Parents — acute paternal anxiety with selfflagellation.
It’s easy to see how this could extend to a wider male understanding of gender inequality in all areas of life. For instance, one man might look at the recent reports about crackdowns on sexist advertising and think: ‘‘Jeez, what’s all the fuss about?’’ The father of a young daughter, on the other hand, might feel very differently about billboards featuring a scantily clad young woman and an exhortation to fret about being ‘‘beach body ready’’.
While many men miraculously manage not to be chauvinists all by themselves, for others a daughter could prove a wakeup call that is stronger, more visceral than any number of #MeToo campaigns. At which point, big and small inequalities that may have passed almost unnoticed regarding women they’ve known and even loved (mothers, sisters, friends) are thrown into unprecedented sharp focus. As I say, an education — that ‘‘man’s world’’ could start looking very different when a father’s ‘‘mighty girl’’ has to navigate it.