Jack of all trades wanted

WHY should so many good things come from Southland? The following two inches of sheer delight has just appeared in an Invercargill paper: ‘‘Borough of Riverton — Applications accompanied by testimonials are invited for the combined positions of Surfaceman, Gas Manager, Corporation Carter, Night Soil Removal Service Contractor, Sexton, Poundkeeper, Inspector of Nuisances, and Dog Tax Collector. Applicant to state remuneration required.’’

We have all seen or heard of the Central Otago township where the hairdresser is also the bicycle repairer, also the fruiterer, and the dispenser of cakes and sweets, but the brilliancy of this picture pales beside the combination in one person of the whole municipal activities of Riverton, with the exception of the fire brigade and the librarian of the public library. One may readily admit that the sexton may easily add to his duties those of poundkeeper — the offices have a certain similarity, but it is not so easy to imagine a man skilled in dog tax collecting should necessarily be able to act as gas engineer. If closely examined, the two positions are quite incompatible. A man should not be allowed to run about the town collecting dog taxes and stray horses, when he ought to be staying at home making gas. — Civis