Please go home for Christmas
Our priorities were questioned — did we find what’s important?
There’s a certain guilt that engulfsmeon Christmas Day. It’s not the overindulging in food and booze— we should never feel guilty about that— it’s usually because I’m not withmyfamily.
I live in Auckland andmyfamily are scattered around Southland and Otago. They always choosesomeone to host and thosewhocan turnup for aday of celebration, which usually consists of making sure the kids are happy with their haul from Santa and a catch-up with the big questions about life and relationships.
Then, if the kids allow, everyone has an afternoon siesta so they are ready for round two.
Booking a ticket and flying to Southland on Christmas Eve is usually very expensive, and I’d rather spend thatmoneyon presents for the nieces and nephews.
I’ve worked on the telly or radio on Christmasday formanyyears, so Ihave had a pretty good excuse, but I still can’t help but think the family suspect I’m avoiding them.
If they are reading this, I’m not— it’s just sometimeswecan’tcome homefor Christmas and this year there will bemanywhoface thesame situation.
Over the years I’m remindedwhen working that I’m not the only Christmas orphan. Retailers usually only get Christmas Dayoff as they prepare for the Boxingdaysales. Hospitality workers work extended hours to cash in on the influx of visitors, and emergency services actually get busier as wefrolic withnew scooters, bikes and water toys— they too probably juggle with the guilt of not being with their loved ones but wanting to maintain their jobs.
This year, in particular, I can’t help but think of those whocan’t actually gohome to their native countries due to Covid travel restrictions. Ihave a friendwhohas to head overseas to see her family due to illness and has used all her savings to pay for flights and quarantinewhenreturning.
She’s lucky she has the funds to even consider that— formanyit wouldn’t be the case and that leaves thousands around the countrywho will rely on “adopted” family Christmas days.
I once hostedmyownorphans’ Christmas andwas blownawayby howmanypeople turnedup— they didn’t have the option of heading home, sowehad a great day together.
There were people doing their OE, peoplewhoworked retail in the big smokeand couldn’t get time off, and there weresomewhojust didn’t want to gohomefor various reasons.
That day will always stick inmy
mind— not just because it wasfun, but because it felt like Iwas helping people in complicated situations, even lonely neighbourswhohad no family.
While writing this there have been numerous media reports about the mosque-attack Royal Commission of Inquiry and the one-year anniversary of the tragic events on Whakaari.
It hitmehard that all those people affected don’t actually have loved ones around to even try to gethome for. There will be people this yearwho have lost family membersand friends unexpectedly, and that makes Christmasdayeven harder.
Yes, welove the break, we love the celebrations and surrounding ourselves with material things— even working Christmasday to cash in on the time and ahalf sowecan have extramoney— but is it worth it if we don’tmakethe effort to gethomeat least once in a while?
Wehave all faced a year in which our priorities in life have been questioned— we hopefully found what’s important to us all and what makes us happy if the daily grind of life is suddenly put on hold.
Forsomeit’s been ahuge and devastating time, for others a revelation and a chance to change direction.
Asweapproach the Christmas break and anewyear, I hope you havemadesomeeffort to try to get home.
For thosewhocan’t, for whatever reason, Ihope someone has checked in andmadesure you’re not spending the day by yourself— but whatever the excuse or situation, Ihope you don’t feel guilty.
I could havemadea better effort this year, but that hasn’t happened.
Given the loss somepeople have endured and the restrictionswehave had this year, perhaps that somewhat excusable guilt will eventually getme homefor Christmas Day.