Dun­can Garner: It was Win­ston’s week


In pol­i­tics it’s never the crime – it’s al­ways the sloppy and poorly ex­e­cuted cover-up that gets them ev­ery time.

And boy did we see that with the ‘‘Baby Bar­clay’’ pants­ing last week.

What a mess – and so woe­fully han­dled by a bum­bling Bill English in his first true test of man­ag­ing a scan­dal as prime min­is­ter. Put on the spot, he failed. The cur­rent PM is cer­tainly no John Key when it comes to sprint­ing back­wards, blind­folded, out of a rag­ing in­ferno without get­ting so much as singed.

This scan­dal should mat­ter and does mat­ter.

Todd Bar­clay, at worst, il­le­gally taped a staff mem­ber, re­fused to co-op­er­ate with a po­lice in­quiry and sent it up­stairs to then-pm John Key, who agreed to a se­cret tax­payer pay­out in the form of hush money to make it all go away.

The truth is Bar­clay, Key and English all knew the facts and struck the se­cret deal to pull down the south­ern shut­ters on this sor­did af­fair, hop­ing the dead bodies would be buried in a far flung cor­ner of South­land, never to be seen or heard again.

That would al­low Bar­clay to carry on as a new young MP with an ex­cit­ing fu­ture.

No prob­lems right? Dead (meat) wrong.

No won­der Key shot through and ran for the near­est (pri­vate) golf course. He must be chuck­ling from the 19th hole.

Like Hou­dini, he made a great es­cape from cer­tain death which came in the form of some­thing as sim­ple as the truth.

What I learned in my time at Par­lia­ment was two things, sadly scep­ti­cal and breath­lessly cyn­i­cal, but this was my ex­pe­ri­ence of a 17-year lag in the place.

1: The truth usually comes out, and 2; an MP’S de­fault set­ting, when un­der pres­sure, is to lie.

Then Na­tional, just as they were sink­ing in their own slime, got thrown a red life­line from their brain-dead at­tack­ers.

Na­tional’s get-out-of-jail card came in the form of a sur­prise visit from the truly in­com­pe­tent Labour Party and their stun­ning dou­ble stan­dards and sick­en­ing hypocrisy.

These so-called de­fend­ers of higher wages, bet­ter work­ing con­di­tions and cuts to the so-called fraud of in­ter­na­tional stu­dents com­ing into the coun­try were found guilty of an old and com­mon dis­ease called; ‘‘egg on truly em­bar­rassed red-face’’.

Can you ac­tu­ally be­lieve Labour’s dirty lit­tle plan?

Labour im­ports 85 slaves in the form of for­eign stu­dents, chucks them in a crummy marae with a bro­ken shower and sub-stan­dard dorms and hopes they’ll work for free on the elec­tion cam­paign with the dis­tant hope of a lec­ture by He­len Clark about, (cue more hypocrisy) demo­cratic and hu­man rights.

If Labour’s union mates and fun­ders weren’t so close to all this they’d be speak­ing out crit­i­cis­ing it. But this is their club - they’ll stay si­lent like the poo­dles they are.

So there’s only win­ner here – the smil­ing trav­el­ling sales­man, Win­ston Peters.

And be­cause we all have dread­fully short mem­o­ries, we’ve for­got­ten his se­lec­tive am­ne­sia over his party’s se­cret Spencer Trust and the num­ber of times he’s been a to­tal dis­as­ter and been sacked from govern­ment.

Argh, for­get it, all is for­given. Win­ston’s a win­ner this week.

Be­cause the two ma­jor par­ties looked like tired, ly­ing, hope­less cover-up mer­chants and hyp­ocrites.

And Win­ston flashed us all of his 32 per­fect teeth and said, pick me.


Clutha-south­land MP Todd Bar­clay re­signed this week.

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