Verbal abuse hurting rural women
Rural women suffering from verbal violence from partners often feel there is no way out because of their ties with children, animals and a farm property.
Ruapehu-whanganui Rural Support Trust co-ordinator Lyn Neeson said physical violence was more commonly seen as abuse, but rural women also endured verbal anguish from partners.
‘‘We’re not talking physical violence, but mental violence, which can go on for years,’’ she said at a a Women’s Wellbeing Event attended by 16 women at Ohakune on Wednesday.
The wellbeing workshop is one of five events and supported by Rural Women New Zealand. A counsellor and police talked about the impact of mental anguish.
She said women often talked to other women, unlike many men, and often it enabled them to go back and cope ‘‘a bit longer’’.
‘‘There are resources there, Women’s Refuge, the police, but there is a stigma attached to going for help to them, for many rural women.’’
She said the workshop was not
‘‘Family business demands, mean they can't get away from it.’’ Fiona Gower
about people leaving, but getting help.
‘‘Often men start out shouting to their dogs and in the yard. Then they could talk to family members like that. It’s not okay.’’
Neeson said men who were over 40 and had worked hard physically, were susceptible to changes in their emotions, and that could be the cause of depression or frustration which could lead to verbal abuse of their partners.
She said many women would feel the pressure of staying on a farm, because of the children who could be the fourth or fifth generation working the property.
Most of the impetus on rural mental health was focussed on men and women’s mental health was an unseen issue.
She said rural women were seen as the strong ones and often that wasn’t the case.
Rural Women New Zealand president Fiona Gower said the risks rural women faced that urban women might not were in areas such as not being intellectually stimulated enough and not being valued for their skills in the farming business.
‘‘Family business demands, mean they can’t get away from it and often feel they have not earned the money from the farm, so can’t spend it.’’