Steven Adams for president
A humble Kiwi would be a great leader of the free world, instead of this wall-obsessed blowhard.
IN the future, these last days will be referred to as BT – Before Trump. Planet Earth as we know it will remain relatively normal at least until Wednesday. Then it will be AD – After Donald.
These are bizarre times, when a person running for the most powerful job in the world can slag off black people, Hispanics, women and whole countries, propose a ban on an entire religion – and still be in the running to win.
That weirdness is right up there with Boris Johnson convincing Britain to leave the EU and then becoming foreign minister.
How is all this oddity even possible? It’s been like one long wacky Wednesday. As though we’re all Bill Murray in Groundhog Day.
For the past year, the peoples of the world have moved through the various stages of grief – the denial, then anger, bargaining, depression and, finally, disbelieving, horrified acceptance.
We’re now into another stage, which generally involves making jokes about it, as contemplating the alternative could lead to a padded cell at the Mason Clinic.
Who knows how many years AD will last? It may not even be for that long. Still, nowhere will be safe. Not even a seclusion room in a Wellington primary school. President Trump might grab a world leader by the p...y and start World War 3.
Perhaps Trump should build a wall on the Mexican border, after all. Then he should add more around the whole of America, so the world is safe from him. He might want to include a dome roof to keep out migratory birds.
For now, though, we still live in the BT era and it’s nice that in these last days of normality in America, we had the biggest New Zealand sports story since Lydia Ko became the world’s youngest number one female golfer.
Proud Tongan Kiwi Steven Adams scored himself a mega contract in the NBA and, in doing so, shattered the preconceptions about what tough troubled youngsters can do with their lives.
There have always been pathways into professional sport through rugby, league, cricket and – though less often– football.
But cracking the NBA is another level altogether. This is a competition that inspires fans around the whole planet. Its culture and history features some of sports’ biggest superstars. A league that icons such as Michael Jordan helped make huge.
Sean Marks – who is, REUTERS awesomely, now general manager of the Brooklyn Nets – was the first Kiwi who did it. But Adams didn’t just crack the NBA, he’s a star of the NBA. You know you’ve made it when middle-class white Americans are wearing jerseys with your number on it and chanting your name.
Adams works extremely hard for everything that comes his way. He has made real something that many youngsters only ever dared to dream about.
It’s not a given that there will be an endless line of equally talented basketballers who will follow him into NBA stardom, but Steven Adams is now forever a 7 foot 1 shining beacon of what is possible.
You just hope that we’ll have lots of time to enjoy it, and that a majority of Americans don’t cut the wrong wire and send us into AD.