Taking the Mickey
Beating the Disneyland queues
AVIP tour of the Happiest Place On Earth is probably out of reach for most Kiwis. Every time I ask my guides just how much an all-access guided tour of Disneyland or Disney World is, there’s a lot of eyelash fluttering and bashful demurring. ‘‘It’s... a lot,’’ says our Disneyland host Emily. ‘‘But, don’t worry. I’ve got you covered. You can be your own VIP host.’’
So with a sprinkle of fairy dust and wave of Tinker Bell’s wand, here’s our guide to mastering Disney – both Land and World...
1. Hatch a cunning plan
Emily says timing is everything to get the most out of Disneyland.
‘‘Planning your trip during the right season is really important.
‘‘I know it’s hard to plan vacations around school schedules and everything but the best time of year to come is in the ‘off-season’.’’
Yes, even Disney has an off-season. It’s between Christmas and the start of the United States’ ‘‘Spring break’’ (roughly the last week of February) and is a great time to come.
Then it’s better to come on a week day and, if possible, on a day that the park closes early.
‘‘I always look into days like that whenever I come to the park to play as a guest,’’ says Emily. ‘‘The lines will be a lot more manageable.’’
On days that the park is open until midnight (which it is most days), Emily says it’s best to come in the afternoon and stay until the closing time.
‘‘A lot of the small kids and families go home around that time, so that’s a good time to knock out a few of the big rollercoasters.’’
There are also better times on any day to hit the most popular attractions.
‘‘Whenever there are parades going on or fireworks – if that entertainment is not a priority for you, doing the big attractions during fireworks is a good time to go,’’ says our Florida host, Meghan.
‘‘Think about where everyone else is going to be and do the opposite. If there’s a parade on, it might be a good time to get that ride you’ve been putting off.’’
Top tip: Stay at the park. It might cost more, but the perks of staying on-site are pretty significant.
They include Magic Hour early access to the parks, purchases at the park being delivered to your room so you don’t have to cart them around all day (in Florida, at least), as well as great pools and activities at the resorts, can make your family holiday all run more smoothly.
I stayed at Jambo House at Disney’s Animal Kingdom in Florida, which is connected to the parks by a frequent free bus service, has a stunning pool and cute themed rooms. There are also several budget options in Florida that are still well connected to the park.
In California, I stayed at the Disneyland Hotel, which has a lot of mid-century charm, as well as a fab pool and Tiki-themed bar. But best of all, it is about a five-minute walk from the park, making those very early morning starts far less painful.
It also makes taking a midday break from the parks possible, which you might need if you’re staying for more than two or three days.
2. Work the system
In Florida, the FastPass system for spending less time in queues has been integrated into a wristband that can act as your hotel room key, cash, dinner reservation holder, picture purchaser and FastPass.
It can be customised, meaning all you need to leave your hotel with in the morning is the wristband. And it makes a Tinker Bell wand sound every time you use it. Magic.
You can also book your day’s passes ahead of time using the My Disney Experience app – there’s a limit of three a day per park.
The app is super handy, because it also shows all the wait times for rides in all the parks and has great zoom-in maps to minimise the chances of getting lost: a key feature when you’re dealing with five distinct theme parks covering a place roughly the same size as San Francisco.
The FastPass system is a little more old-school in California, but that’s OK because the parks are smaller and much closer together.
It also means there’s a knack to getting the most out of the FastPass system.
‘‘What you should do is have someone be the designated FastPass runner at the beginning of the day,’’ says Emily. ‘‘As a group, prioritise what attractions you want to get done – and have that one person run and go grab the first FastPass of the day.’’
Then your group is free to check out another ride. You can find a short waiting time with the app, but be warned: unlike Disney World, there’s no wi-fi at Disneyland.
Top tip: Read our FastPass tactics in the panel opposite.
3. Take a break
The busiest part of any day at the parks is 1pm-4pm. It’s also, funnily enough, the hottest and the point you’re most likely to start losing your cool.
Take a break. Leave the park. If you’re at a resort, head back there for a couple of hours’ relaxation by the pool or just lying on your bed with the air-con on.
In California, hit Downtown Disney for some real food. In Florida, take the Monorail to the Polynesian Resort for a swim in the pool.
If you don’t want to leave the park, try to find a spot to sit. There’s a whole dining area with shade at California Adventure, as well as a few bars and restaurants if you’re flush.
Top tip: If you just need a five-minute break, there’s a ‘‘secret’’ room in Cinderella’s castle, left of the back entrance and opposite the Bibbiti Bobbity Boutique. It’s cool, shady and there’s a couch you can sit on for a few minutes while you pull yourself together, apply fresh sunscreen and get ready to take on the park again.
4. Eat me, drink me, buy me
Bring a water bottle and a few snacks.
Book a character breakfast at places like Disney’s PCH Grill at the Paradise Pier Hotel and The Plaza Inn in Disneyland; and at Chef Mickey’s at the Contemporary Resort and Good Morning Breakfast with Goofy and His Pals in the Four Seasons Resort at Disney World. If you want some oneon-one time with Mickey, Minnie and the gang, these are the places to get it.
Bump souvenir shopping to the end of the night; the shops stay open an hour after closing.
Behind the Dole Whip kiosk in Adventureland is a second line that is always shorter. Don’t miss out on Disney Dole Whip (it’s pineapple softserve icecream).
Top tip: You can buy most of the same things in all the stores around the park – except adorable plush animal print Mickey ears. They are only available at the Bazaar in Adventureland.
5. Dress for success
My first day in the park I wore Jandals, which are now in a California landfill somewhere – where I never have to see them again. Repeat after me: Jandals are not Disney.
It’s possible to walk nearly 20km in a day at Disneyland and California Adventure – that’s taking it easy. It could be even more at Disney World, which is far larger. So dress like you’re going for a hike... at least on your lower half, so your selfies aren’t ugly.
Top tip: Walking shoes. Walking shoes. Walking shoes.
The writer travelled courtesy of Disney Parks & Resorts.