The most un-PC car on planet?
The Range Rover Sport SVR is a blatant snub to the PC brigade and the planet. And it is utterly magnificent, writes Damien O’Carroll.
It would seem these days that you can’t build a large SUV without offering a ridiculously over-powered, over-the-top version of it for no other reason than ‘‘because you can’’. And now Land Rover has upped the crazy on its already quite mad Range Rover Sport SVR. And the results are magnificent.
Why have they made it look like a Jeep Grand Cherokee Trackhawk?
Hey, that’s not fair... but it is quite accurate.
Land Rover has come over quite Trackhawk with the new SVR, with the most obvious similarity being the not-at-all subtle dual vents on the carbon-fibre bonnet.
This is because the SVR is all about trumpeting its power and performance in a way that is completely unapologetic, just like the Jeep – brash, shouty and proud. Hell, you can even order the unpainted carbon-fibre bonnet if you want to go full Russian oligarch on it.
While I can’t say I would personally have picked the black on white exterior and interior colour combo, nor would I have gone for the carbon-fibre highlight pack, the SVR still manages to be rather shouty without any visual help, thanks to its magnificently brutal supercharged V8.
This is because when you accelerate, it not only belts off at a pace that is quite unexpected and frankly alarming, but it also makes a noise like the world is ending.
But don’t cars like this actually help bring about the end of the world with their profligate consumption?
Yeah, but if we all drove Nissan Leafs the world might last longer, but it would be terribly boring.
The SVR is a blatant and joyous celebration of conspicuous consumption, unnecessary speed and brutal performance, and even in its laughable ‘‘Eco’’ mode it is still thunderous and unapologetic. Its mere existence will offend a lot of people, but not anyone who loves the sheer noise and aggression it embraces and generously shares.
Of which I am one, even though I despise so-called ‘‘sports’’ SUVs.
Nail the throttle from a standing start and the nose rears up into the air as it belts violently forward emitting an ear-splitting and antisocial roar that probably shouldn’t be legal. This isn’t a ‘‘sports’’ SUV; it is a muscle car in disguise.
The SVR knocks off the 0 to 100 sprint in 4.5 seconds (which considering it weighs a hefty
2.3 tonnes, is equal parts impressive and disturbing) and will charge relentlessly to a top speed of 283kmh.
Virtually every part of the SVR has been overhauled and refined for the new version, and it shows – the performance is brutal and it actually handles rather well into the bargain.
OK, that needs to be appended with ‘‘for a 2.3 tonne SUV’’, because it ain’t a sports car and it does feel utterly massive on a twisty back road. While you can hustle it along one at a remarkable rate, you wouldn’t necessarily describe the experience as ‘‘fun’’, more an uncomfortable blend of ‘‘surprising’’ and ‘‘terrifying’’.
But how does it do luxury? It is a Range Rover, after all.
This is true, and it has to be said that it still does luxury rather well. But you do have to throw a proviso on that too – ‘‘for a brutal performance car’’.
Yes, the SUV is still a Range Rover, so boasts all the superb materials, brilliantly comfortable seats and luxury toys inside, and even adds the gorgeous dual touchscreen setup first seen in the Velar (which is a vast improvement on the old touchscreen, but still a tad slow), but it also has a far more aggressively sporty suspension setup.
The air suspension is remarkably capable, but even in comfort mode is still quite firm. This is never much of an issue though, and it is always comfortable, but it can become slightly busy over rough surfaces.
But who cares? It isn’t supposed to be the ultimate in luxury, just the fastest Land Rover made so far. And the noisiest. And, by God, it is very good at both of those.
So it’s a Range Rover and it is stupidly powerful – how much does that hurt the wallet?
Oh, a lot. But that isn’t really the point.
The SVR costs a notinconsiderable $209,000 before options, and that is just the beginning of the massive drain it will be on your bank account.
The company manages to claim a combined fuel consumption figure of 9.5L/100km while keeping a straight face, but in reality it is closer to double this, particularly when you drive the SVR like it goads you to – even at respectable and legal speeds it is all but impossible to not give it way more revs than necessary, just to hear the magnificent noise it makes...
But who cares? Not anyone who will buy it, that is for sure.
Any other cars I should consider?
The obvious ones are the 423kW/ 750Nm BMW X5M and 430kW/ 760Nm Mercedes-AMG GLE 63 S. At $206,100 and $212,290 respectively, the big Germans are the Sport SVR’s closest natural competitors, although both lack the big Rangie’s undeniable charm and sheer belligerent aggression.
But there are also a couple of curveballs in the mix, courtesy of the 522kW/868Nm Jeep Grand Cherokee Trackhawk and the smaller 375NkW/700Nm MercedesAMG GLC 63 S, both of which pull off the Sport SVR’s angry muscle car charm, searing performance and luxury pretensions, but clock in at far lower pricing of $169,990 and $185,290 respectively.
But while there are ridiculous performance SUVs that are cheaper or have more power (or, in the case of the Jeep, both), none of them have the sheer weighty presence of being a Range Rover behind them. And that is all that counts with the mighty SVR.