Ways to deal with emotional eating
Emotional eating has become very common. Whether it is regularly over-eating, you start eating and you can’t stop, or perhaps you know better but you still eat too much poor quality food.
Maybe it’s the other end of the spectrum and you don’t eat enough. In all of these scenarios it is never about the food. It is an often unconscious strategy attempting to numb emotional pain.
There is a big difference between eating two squares of chocolate and the whole block, between a sweet biscuit with a cup of tea in the evening and half the packet.
Emotional eating is when we eat for non-physiological reasons – we’re not actually hungry. We’re literally feeding our feelings, which may be sadness, anxiety, frustration, or even happiness. When I talk about stress in this context I am not denying that genuine distress and trauma don’t exist – sadly they do. In this context, I am referring to day-today stresses.
These stresses are, at times, our fears undercover. If you follow what stresses you out to the end, you will see that what most people are frightened of is how others see them.
So if you (subconsciously) create meanings across the day that you disappointed someone, or that they think less of you for example, you will try to escape from feeling that in many ways, a common one of which is eating or drinking in a way that doesn’t serve your health.
Be mindful of when you’re eating to alleviate stress or when you’re eating because you’re hungry. Typically, the types of food you want will be the clue here. Not many people crave a big bowl of kale when they are stressed. We are completely governed by how we feel. Working out how you want to feel and finding non-food related activities or focuses that support that can really help.
It is important to disconnect food from your reward system, and start rewarding yourself with other fulfilling activities.
When you’re not hungry but find yourself peering into the fridge looking for something, try to find comfort in non-food related ways. For example: go for a walk, read a book, observe nature, watch your children sleep, treat yourself to a relaxing bath or massage, talk to a wise friend. A nourishing plant-based smoothie, hummus and vegetables sticks, soup, home-cooked leftovers, bliss balls (nuts, seeds, and a small amount of fruit to sweeten), two squares of good quality dark chocolate (preferably 70 per cent).
By eating while you’re experiencing emotions that you find challenging, you are giving food a new significance, beyond just meeting your nutritional needs. Food becomes a coping strategy, making your desire for it intensify.
You begin to believe that you need this food to get through these emotions you are experiencing. Research indicates that eating poor quality, high-sugar foods can affect activity in the parts of your brain that manage stress, further reinforcing a reliance on this as a coping strategy.
When you feel like you want to eat in a way that doesn’t serve you, ask yourself what you really want. Name it or write it down. Yet, it’s not even about having that; it’s about how you perceive having that will make you feel, so identify that.
Then incorporate more activities into your life that allow you to feel the emotions you are looking for the food to help you feel. Be patient and kind with yourself as you explore why you might be emotionally eating. ❚ Dr Libby has a new range of food-based nutritional supplements. Visit bioblends.co.nz for more information. See drlibby.com for her blog. ❚ Dr Libby is a nutritional biochemist, best-selling author and speaker. The advice contained in this column is not intended to be a substitute for direct, personalised advice from a health professional.