The high costs of our Ardern’s charm offensive

As Nelson niggled and demanded heavy machinery, the PM was busy writing out cheques to the questionable democracies in paradise. About $3m for Samoa in the wake of Gita.

The smiling assassin, otherwise known as Prime Minister Jacinda Arden launched into my so called cynicism this week.

I described her cheque-carrying jaunt around the Pacific as a ‘‘charm offensive’’.’ How damn inoffensive but it hit one of her nerves.

How could anyone honestly be sensitive about that phrase? I mean, come on, it’s hardly original. Anyway, charm offensive it was.

Of course I hadn’t finished. I had remarked earlier in the week that this trip would see us carrying record amounts of aid and gifts into the Pacific following the absolute devastation wrecked by Cyclone Gita.

On that front, that’s our job, right? To act as good neighbours and international citizens. But then I dug deeper to find out that in just the last few years, New Zealand’s poured $1billion into the Pacific in aid money according to the Department for Foreign Affairs and Trade. And truth be known apparently we don’t put in enough compared to others.

I knew we did our bit, but I had no idea we put in so much. That figure amounts to 60 per cent of our entire foreign aid budget.

No wonder they were up in arms in the wider Nelson area – many there claim they’ve been forgotten in the wake of Cyclone Gita. And fair enough too.

As Nelson niggled and demanded heavy machinery, the PM was busy writing out cheques to the questionable democracies in paradise. About $3m for Samoa in the wake of Gita and $10m for Tonga for all that extensive damage.

You’d be a miser to be critical of that spend. That’s our job, to help those mates in need.

But. There’s always a but. Because that $13m combined is more than the last Government gave over four years for a regional tourism investment fund for the whole damn country.

No wonder we have a freedom camping problem with tourists defecating in curbs: and our answer is, Minister Kelvin Davis and his ridiculously named ‘‘working committee’’. What’s that compared to a ‘‘committee’’.

Anyway back to the Pacific. And there’s more, much much more for the Pacific than a working committee. Sorry Mangaweka. And sorry Nelson, wait your turn. Get in line, behind those holding other passports.

We generously invested in the private sector across the Pacific this week too. In Samoa, the business sector got $6m, a Nuie solar power outfit got $5m and in Tonga, a five year electricity project got $11m dollars.

And will all the money go into the right pockets? Or will someone lean on someone to get their slice, when they shouldn’t? And will we ever know? And for all the aid we and others send in, are the lives of locals improving? Do we even check?

Or will climate change ultimately swallow these countries in the end and are all these millions of dollars ultimately futile?

If so should we relocate everyone now? Because for every dollar spent propping up a tin-pot democracy there’s an opportunity cost.

Imagine if we spent that money here.

We have underfunded our schools, we are 700 teachers short, we are thousands of builders short, we can’t find enough police officers, people live in cars and motels rather than decent, dignified housing for those doing it tough.

All our children should have a personal computer at school by age 7 but we’re not creative or flexible enough to think how we can do it.

We should have had a second proper harbour crossing by now in Auckland and we’re apparently so rich as a country we can keep national superannuation for all, no matter how rich or poor, at age 65.

Indeed we’ve solved so many of our own problems and we’re rolling in so much cash now that we’re allowing certain people in certain Pacific countries to draw the NZ taxpayer funded pension and we’re not requiring them to live in our country. Are we too kind? Are we way too soft?

Are we just being responsible for our backyard? Or are we ignoring the plight of those in our own street so we can feel good about a country or two three hours away. It could be worse. While we give the Pacific these cheques, we could be spying on our citizens here at home in the wake of a massive earthquake. Imagine if we did that?