Kindy offers lessons for children and adults alike

Iremember when the cloud finally lifted. I was not aware it had settled but the moment it lifted was obvious. I guess it appeared between fits of broken sleep, bouts of pre-school attitude, a baby who didn’t like sleeping on his own and a non-stop pile of chores.

It evaporated when I ran in the drizzle, just to be alone. When I took on extra writing so I would know the satisfaction of completing something. When I ordered everyone into the rumpus room so I could tidy the lounge with the music blasting, and no other sound.

This week I spent a morning as ‘mother help’ at my son’s kindergarten.

I thought it would be a morning spent painting and shaping playdough with my pre-schooler and toddler. A cosy morning reading stories and drinking coffee while they ate their morning tea.

The morning escaped before we had done either of those activities.

Through moments of calm, bursts of energy erupted like volcanoes around us. Out of nowhere, a group of boys riding bikes began challenging the others who were running around on foot.

‘‘Roar!’’ went one group. ‘‘Argh!’’ went the other. The challenge was met, with both sides opting to split and head to opposite ends of the playground. Peace was restored, no intervention required.

I had to stop myself from stepping in when my son was challenged by a larger kid as they each waited for a turn on the flying fox.

I’m glad I stayed put. My boy kept calm and stood his ground. Well, he did give the other boy a shove when he refused to let him on. But my son wasn’t overly aggressive. I watched, impressed, as he successfully negotiated for his turn.

I had my hesitations about sending him to a kindergarten that focused on ‘free play’ and ‘childled learning’.

How will my son know when to stop playing and go eat? Will anyone make sure he has a drink all day? Will he use the toilet if no one reminds him? How will he learn if he’s playing all day?

But witnessing the intense moments of negotiation that morning, I could see exactly what powerful lessons he was getting.

These kindy kids know how to verbalise their frustrations. They work hard to solve problems. They keep calm in testing situations. They join in each other’s play and help create the rules.

They imagine they are adventurers and explorers, mummies and daddies, villains and heroes.

I left two hours later with a new appreciation for kindergarten teachers.

Ours have overseen the kids building bug hotels, tending gardens, painting portraits and making lemonade. How do they find the time?

All I managed that morning was to pretend to drink the many cups of tea poured for me from the water play table. That’s pretty much it.

I went home to enjoy some peace and quiet while my son stayed for the afternoon session.

A realisation dawned on me. This is how it must feel to be 4 and to be told to sit still and listen while your legs want to run, your voice wants to shout and your hands want to create as you make order from the chaos around you.

Mothers have this honed ability to multi-task in the most trying of circumstances.

I remember the moment when the cloud lifted. It was a couple of months into being a mother of two. I stood in the shower and sensed the ability to create abstract thoughts beyond my family’s primal needs.

I’m me again, I thought gratefully.

Life’s busy as a parent; it’s equally as busy when you’re a child.

As I picked my son up from kindy this week, I took care to be gentle.

Instead of speaking gruffly to get his attention and rushing to get him out the door, I took my time. I spoke softly, I looked at him, I sat next to him. He responded.

I chose to wait until the clouds departed from him, rather than add to his chaos.

Life’s busy asa parent; it’s equally as busy when you’re a child.