New dad, 27, in plea to find his own lost father
The day Kane McGarvey came into this world was the closest he ever came to meeting his father.
That was when the man he has never known visited the New Plymouth hospital and left him a yellow knitted cardigan and an empty photo album.
And then he disappeared.
Now McGarvey is a dad himself, and it’s the 27-year-old’s relationship with his 3-month-old son Elijah that has triggered the search for that missing part of his life. ‘‘Life’s been different for me ... Everyone else had a mother and a father, and a wee family dynamic and I’ve just never had that,’’ he said from his Hamilton home.
‘‘I want to know where I come from. I don’t want to leave a blank slate for my son.’’
McGarvey knows very little about the man who dropped the items to Taranaki Base Hospital on August 24, 1991.
And he doesn’t know how to go about finding him. But earlier this week he posted on his Facebook page a plea for information about his father, starting his story with, ‘‘So here goes nothing’’.
‘‘I’ve been looking for a little while . . . It would be interesting to meet the guy,’’ he said.
‘‘He could be deceased but even some information on him would be cool.
‘‘In a situation like this you don’t just have a kid and take them presents and not tell anybody.’’
As the story goes, McGarvey’s mum met ‘‘Wayne’’ – she says she cannot remember the man’s name – at Waitara Town and Country Club one night towards the end of 1990.
McGarvey said she told him ‘‘Wayne’’ was fair skinned, had a receding hairline and was about 30 years old.
The two spent the night together and nine months later, ‘‘Wayne’’ was told he had fathered a son.
When he arrived at the hospital, McGarvey’s mum told him to stay out of her life.
‘‘Wayne’’ was never heard from again. And McGarvey’s mum has never offered up any more information.
Life has not been easy for McGarvey.
He said his mother handed him over to state care when he was 1 year old.
He claims to have lived in 76 different foster homes across Taranaki. He lived with his mother for six months when he was 11, before returning to foster care.
When he was 16, he moved out on his own and went to Hamilton.
McGarvey is matter-of-fact when he speaks of his childhood.
He struggled through school, resented living in state care, and longed to be a part of a family.
But life is different for him now. He’s let all of that go.
He has his son Elijah to focus on, and wants to provide him with a stable life.
‘‘There’s no point in being angry any more.
‘‘I just want to know my bloodline, my ancestry and whether I have any other siblings.’’
McGarvey still has the photo album and the yellow cardigan.
He now remains hopeful somebody can connect him with the man who gave it to him.
Private investigator Mike Gillam, of The Investigators New Zealand, believes McGarvey’s best bet is to focus on the club where his parents met.
There could be members from that era who could offer information, said Gillam, who is a former policeman.
‘‘When you are talking about a name and a place they met and a description, it really does come down to getting enough word of mouth around the place,’’ he said.
‘‘But that is at the very, very difficult end of the spectrum.’’
Gillam said most private investigators can work with just a full name, but the more information the better.