Crocs don’t knock my socks off
Some fashions come and go, and some, unfortunately, come back. Annoyingly for me all the fashions of my awkward youth, that I tried so desperately to run away from and deleted all pictures of, seem to have come back with a vengeance.
Ridiculously baggy jeans, bucket hats, oversized hoodies, hair claws, the mullet, and worst of them all, yes worse that the mullet – Crocs.
If you are unfamiliar with Crocs, first off lucky you, secondly, let me describe them.
They’re a slip-on shoe made of a rubbery material that come in a range of colours and are instantly recognisable because they are covered in holes.
They just look awful.
The company was founded in
Platform Crocs and Croc accessories, which plug into the holes in the shoe and act like charms are also incredibly popular.
2002 in Colorado in America and when they first came out, I remember them widely being thought of as a fashion crime committed mainly by the Baby Boomer generation.
My generation, the millennials, wouldn’t have been caught dead in a pair.
Fast-forward 20 years, and for some reason, my generation as well as Gen Z after us have decided to bring them back and make them hip.
Well I say no, sir. You cannot change my mind and will never see my foot sliding into a Croc.
Even if I did feel the need to partake I couldn’t afford the
price tag of $85.99, which is the minimum for a basic pair in New Zealand.
My boss asked me if I’d tried them on, stating they are ‘‘outrageously comfortable’’ but I won’t even dabble.
The most outrageous part of these hideous things making a return is the new accessories that have come with them – Croc Jibbitz. They’re like charms for a Pandora bracelet – on your feet – I just don’t understand.
Other variations of the Croc have also reared their head with the shoes’ comeback.
There are platform Crocs to match other platform shoes, a trend made big by the Spice Girls in the 1990s, stiletto Crocs, which defeats the whole purpose of them being ‘outrageously comfortable’, and a fleece-lined Croc sandal, which just seems contradictory.
There are also kids’ Crocs. Now I don’t care how much peer pressure my son receives in the coming years, I’m just not sure if I can bring myself to buy him a pair.
Perhaps I am alone in my hate of this trend though.
During the pandemic, shares in Crocs rose to an all-time high apparently due to people seeking a little extra comfort while staying at home.
Justin Bieber has even done a couple of collaborations with them, stating ‘‘Crocs with socks is definitely the move.’’
I’m sorry, not only is this guy encouraging people to wear Crocs – he is also telling them to pair them with socks!
Back in my day (yes, I realise at 31 this already makes me sound like an 80-year-old) youngsters would not have been seen dead committing this outfit choice.
Generation Z have regularly told us millennials that our fashion is no longer on trend.
Apparently skinny jeans and side parts are so last decade, but if Crocs have taught me anything it’s that they’ll be back.
Whether I like it or not.