Sideswipe
Silent scam creams royalties
Spotify offers free music to millions and the minuscule royalty per stream they pay artists has always been the subject for much grumbling. But a funk band from Michigan called Vulfpeck found a very clever way of flipping the bird to the streaming service by “recording” Sleepify, a 5-minute long silent album, complete with 10 tracks. The band asked its fans to play the silent album on repeat, while they slept, to inflate the royalties from Spotify. The loophole worked for a little while, netting the band around $20,000 before Spotify pulled the plug after two months. Vulfpeck assured its fans that they would use the money to fund an upcoming free to the public tour. “We prefer Vulpeck’s earlier albums,” quipped a Spotify spokesman.
We’ve got it good
A reader writes: “As Fred Dagg once said, ‘We don’t know how lucky we are’. I saw all these bags left outside the Auckland Central City Library with a printed notice saying, ‘Wed 27 July — We are sorry, but your things can’t be stored here. Any items left here tomorrow will be removed.’ In many countries any unattended bags would be instantly removed (or the bomb squad called) instead of being left outside a busy public building for another day!”
Cheeky bit of wordplay
David writes: “My granddaughter has the name ‘floordrobe’ for the bedroom floor where her father ‘hangs’ his clothes.”
What gets schools all riled up
1. My school — Edgewater College — was so strict that you could get a detention just for asking the principal the time! Mind you it did make a difference how you asked . . . ‘What’s the time Mr Wolf?’ (In the style of 80s band South Side of Bombay)
2. Someone at our school tried to bring a case of red wine on 4th Form camp. “We always have wine with dinner at home.” c1981
3. Friends got a Mini up a set of stairs and into the staffroom. Idea grew from noticing staffroom had double doors.
4. It’s not a good idea to sing a double entendre-themed song about looking for a rooster at the school talent quest. Teachers hate that.
5. Our entire year was frog-marched out on our last day because we were dumb and egged the wrong cars.
6. I blew up the Physics Lab at secondary school. Almost lost my hand in the process. For some reason they wouldn’t let me be a lab monitor after that!