Sideswipe
When adolescence strikes later in life
Police were called after an unusual and dangerous chase across a beauty spot in Stroud, Gloucestershire. Three people were seen off-roading across Minchinhampton Common, luring cattle behind them with carrots. One woman was sitting in the boot, dangling out of the back of the car, said Nailsworth resident Ali Elderfield. “The boot was open with this woman sat in there, holding carrots out for the cows. The man driving and woman in passenger seat all looked like they were in their 60s and were all laughing.” (Source: Gloucestershirelive.co.uk)
Sexism in the auction room
A woman in her 40s writes: “While selling our house in Auckland, due to bad planning my husband ended up in Indonesia for a month, avoiding all the open homes, the auction and subsequent negotiations. When setting the reserve the auctioneer insisted on ringing my husband. Oh? It’s the middle of the night there . . . and can’t you sign on my husband’s behalf? Apparently he would ‘feel more comfortable’ speaking to my husband. If it was me overseas would there be a comfort issue? Nah.”
Autocorrect tenacity
1. Carol’s accountant brother always finds it amusing when she texts her frustration about “bloody GST” . . . autocorrect replaces the acronym with “gays”. (Incidentally, Carol’s brother is married to Mark).
David’s son’s friend Ethan is now referred to as Ethanol after numerous text messages have renamed him that.
Melissa tried to tell my dad my kid had done “wees” on the potty for the first time. Autocorrect changed it to “weed”.
Although not autocorrect, this is too good to leave out . . . Once in court Chelsea transcribed “search warrant” incorrectly and wrote: “The police officer entered the property and executed a social worker.” She only realised her mistake when it was read back, aloud in court.
Path clears to greater parking options
“Hallelujah!” declares Karen. “Parking is now available on footpaths. This morning I phoned Auckland Transport about five vehicles parked on the footpaths on both sides of the road outside a construction site and was told; ‘Auckland Transport are no longer monitoring vehicle parking on footpaths/berms/verges unless the vehicle(s) constitute a safety hazard’.”