Starved, beaten and forced to eat a spider
A man who was buffeted around 79 foster homes was starved, beaten, sexually abused and forced to eat a spider while in state care.
Daryl Brougham, 36, was found aged 3 months next to a rubbish bin in Auckland city. Over the next 17 years he would go through a “trainwreck” of multiple homes.
“You see things that normal children will see in their nightmares. You live to survive.
“You’re constantly worrying and trying to find your identity.” Brougham was physically abused in his first placement as a 1-year-old. His foster parents took him to America. When he was 5 he was found weighing the same as a 15-month-old due to starvation. He was brought back to New Zealand where he bounced through multiple homes. He estimated 80 per cent were abusive. One of the worst things that happens for a transient kid is that you lose all your sentimental items, Brougham said. He doesn’t have a photograph of himself younger than 14-years-old.
“You lose identity, you lose trust, you lose your sense of belongingness and you lose sentimental property.
“I’ve been robbed of happy memories.”
And the bad memories stick with you forever. Brougham was punished as a 12-year-old for not folding the laundry properly. He was ordered to cut the grass with scissors while the family went to church. To turn it into fun he cut his name into the grass. But when the foster parents saw that they kicked him so hard he clenched up in pain. Brougham was 11 when his social worker told him he would end up in jail. He was 15 when he fathered a child to one of his caregivers.
In February 2015 he received an official apology from the ministry and $70,000 in compensation. There were found to be 40 serious misconducts by social workers and caregivers.
Brougham is “terrified” of the Child Youth and Family reform that is being launched today and what harm it could bring to vulnerable children.
But one positive of the reform is that the age of care will be extended Brougham said. On his 17th birthday Brougham left care to sleep in a car for six months. “I had nowhere else to go.”