‘Sickening thoughts sat in my head’

One of Rene Naufahu’s victims said the most significant effect of his abuse was “the dissolution of my trust in my own intuition”.

“Rebuilding that has taken years,” she told the Herald.

“There was a long period of time where I didn’t tell anyone about Rene’s offending, fearful for the questions I would be faced with if I did — not knowing I was one of many, not alone.

“These sickening thoughts sat in my head for years. I was manipulated by someone I had given all my trust to.”

After she stopped taking Naufahu’s classes, she still saw him during her work as a model.

“I was so scared he would ask me why I quit his classes or try to talk me into coming back.

“I would have to go into the bathrooms at [a] cafe next to the office and try hold back from actually being sick.”

She said she still has moments where she thinks she’s seen Naufahu in public. “It has never actually been him, just some other man — but the lightning rod of fear that hits in that moment is overwhelming, knowing that he knows I ‘blew the whistle’.”

The woman has been seeing a clinical psychologist since she reported Naufahu to police.

She struggled to cope with attention from other males and said her experience with Naufahu had left her “very uncomfortable, anxious and introverted”.

She has been diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder and her mental state made it hard for her to focus on work and studies.

“Before I met Rene and even in the years after my experience with him — when I was ignoring what had happened — I was an excellent student and worker with a clear plan and goals.

“The stress of talking about what happened and the fear that it brought up derailed that.”

She said the “ordeal” with Naufahu has put a strain on her relationship with her parents, who found it difficult to comprehend what she’d been a victim to.

In the lead-up to Naufahu’s scheduled trial the woman said she suffered immensely, during “one of the worst times of my life”.

“The stress sat in my stomach for weeks, my heart rate felt constantly elevated and I was on the verge of tears all the time.

“I don’t even know if I could have gone into that courtroom without vomiting beforehand.”

She said people she confided in, friends of Naufahu, struggled to accept what had happened. “There have been social consequences of Rene’s offending toward me — it became hard to trust or talk to people that might know it was me who went to the police.”

Watching Naufahu speak to media after his name suppression was lifted was difficult.

She felt his repeated denials made his victims look like they were “horrible liars”.

“It was horrible to think people were reading his words and believing them, especially how adamant he was that it was all just a witch hunt by scorned women.

“It was very hard to silently wait while he was allowed opportunities to defend himself and we weren’t.

“His statement to the media when he pleaded guilty made me feel angry and upset and that he was still trying to discredit us victims.

“He might have mentioned some small apology to us women, but it didn’t sound to me to be one bit sincere or coming from a place of understanding what he has done,” she said.

“His statement felt more concerned with himself and his ego, which seems strange after pleading guilty to sexual crimes.”

The woman hoped she could move on with her life now that her abuser had been sentenced.

“I can finally start to truly put his actions towards me in the past.”