Adoptee a finder of lost families

Vivienne Hill never knew her parents growing up. Now she spends her working life helping other people find theirs.

Born to an unmarried mother in the 1960s, she was adopted out through the Salvation Army after her mother was jilted at the altar.

‘‘My grandfather went to pick up my birth father from the bus station to take him to the wedding, and he wasn’t there.

‘‘Everyone had arrived, the presents were there, the cake was there, the beautiful dress hanging in the wardrobe, and no groom.

‘‘My mother woke up with the realisation the next morning that she had lost her love, but also that she would have to give up her baby because her parents weren’t going to support her. They didn’t in those days.’’

When the adoption laws changed in 1985, Hill decided to trace her birth mother – and encountered the charity again through the Salvation Army’s family tracing service.

She found her mother, and was put in contact with her father. But for the second time, he took the easy way out. ’’We exchanged two letters then he told the Salvation Army he wasn’t interested in further contact, and could I not contact him again.’’

About 1000 people use the service each year to find lost relatives, and at any time the twoperson team in Wellington will have up to 150 active cases, of which about 80 per cent get resolved.

Two family members Hill was able to reunite were Terry Trotman and Vicki Garbutt. Trotman began searching for his birth parents more than a decade ago. His father was believed to be older than his mother, and would have been aged over 100 today.

When he discovered his mother’s identity, she had died too – and with her, he feared, had gone his final hope of knowing his heritage. But her gravestone said she had a daughter called Vicki, so he phoned Hill at the tracing service. ‘‘She said, ‘If you have a sister out there, we’ll find her’.’’

Despite no surname to go on, he had his answer back in only three weeks, and in August this year the two were preparing for an introduction 54 years overdue. ’’Since meeting Vicki, I have met her family, she has met my family, and we text or ring each other at least once a week,’’ Trotman said. ‘‘I’m just over the moon, you couldn’t ask for a better result. I take my hat off to the Salvation Army.’’

Garbutt was also adopted, but had been lucky enough to know her mother. She had never been told she had an older brother.

But not everyone is so lucky. Not long ago, Hill helped a woman track down her mother, and reached out with a letter. The response came in a phone call, which arrived just hours after Hill had left to go on holiday.

When she returned, the first thing she did was phone the daughter, then the mother. ‘‘She didn’t answer the phone, it was her daughter. She said, ‘I’m sorry, she passed away. I just got back from the funeral.’ I felt so gutted.

‘‘She had waited a long time to reconnect with her birth mother. If only I had picked up the phone earlier ...’’

"My mother woke up with the realisation the next morning that she had lost her love, but also that she would have to give up her baby ..." Vivienne Hill