Take the blue/green test
There has been considerable speculation about a new blue/green party being formed. If it crossed the magical 5 per cent threshold, or won an electorate seat, a blue/green party might even be in a coalition government. With an educated and environmentally aware population, Wellington could become a blue/green stronghold. Could you be a blue/green voter? Take this quiz to find out.
1) Climate change is a) The biggest issue we face on Earth. If we don’t act, our children will be in peril. b) Something we should act on as long as it doesn’t hurt economic growth. c) A massive worry when you find out what it might do to the grapes of my favourite Central Otago pinot noir, in which I have a major shareholding.
2) More motorways a) Will simply lead to more cars. b) Are necessary if we want to be prosperous. c) Are bad in principle but very convenient when the family hops in the Tesla and zaps up to the solar-powered pad in Whitianga over Waitangi weekend. That’s last Wednesday to Sunday because no-one worked on Thursday and Friday, did they?
3) You are in the supermarket and forget your reusable bag, so you a) Put the goods straight into your cycle saddle-bag. b) Pay for a reusable bag. c) Ask the nanny to retrieve the shopping later with a hessian bag.
4) Marijuana is a) A health issue, not a criminal issue, and should be legalised. b) Yet another harmful drug and should not be legalised. c) Absolutely fine for educated, responsible, middle-class people like me but I worry about people not as clever as me abusing it.
5) The plastic rings that hold beers cans together should a) Be banned because they can kill marine animals. b) Be allowed because we live in a free society. c) Be banned because canned beer is an abomination compared to bottled craft beer.
6) My vehicle of choice is: a) Bicycle and bus b) Car c) Electric scooter, road bike, e-bike, mountain bike (x 3), foldaway bike, skateboard and unicycle – all whacked on the roof-rack of the Tesla when we go on holiday. 7) Am I concerned about sea level rise? a) Yes, especially for our Pasifika friends living in low-level atolls. b) No. It’s a Left-wing plot to scare people. c) Hell yeah, which is why I put the bach in the Sounds and the ground-floor apartment in Oriental Bay up for sale and reinvested in a townhouse high up on Mt Victoria.
8) Venezuela is a) A workers’ paradise where Comrade Maduro is doing his best despite Yankee imperialism. b) A far-Left dictatorship that proves the futility of socialism. c) An even better eco-tourism destination than Laos, but has terrible wi-fi, mediocre restaurants, and airports that don’t recognise my Koru club membership.
9) When I hear the word ‘Tava’, I think of … a) A bean used in Middle Eastern dips. b) A German living in Tawa. c) A possible future leader of the blue/greens.
10) How often do I fly? a) Only when absolutely necessary and I offset it with carbon credits. b) For business every few months and the occasional overseas holiday. c) About twice a week in order to run my successful, government-subsidised, multinational business developing clean alternatives to fossil fuels.
11) I believe buses and commuter trains are a) Essential for getting people to work. b) Loser cruisers for people who don’t have cars. c) A wonderful way for people to get to work – except me because I have an important job. But more people should take public transport so there is room for my Tesla on the drive in from Eastbourne.
12) How committed am I to recycling? a) We are a zero-waste house. b) We do it when we can but we’re not zealots. c) Totally – since I started my emission-reduction consultancy I have recycled three EAs, 4 PAs and 2 CFOs. 13) Homeless people living in cars is: a) Totally unacceptable. Government must eliminate homelessness. b) An unfortunate by-product of a free society. c) OK, as long as it’s a Tesla or Prius.
14) How do I define sustainability? a) Using resources in a responsible way to ensure our grandchildren survive. b) Making sure that our country’s standard of living continues. c) Getting over 5 per cent or persuading an urban Nat to defect with Simon’s blessing.
15) The 90-day trial is a) A vile assault on workers’ rights. b) A good way for employers to see if a worker fits in. c) Useful for firing new employees who don’t properly use the 12 differently coloured recycle bins in our office.
If you answered mainly ‘‘a’’, you are too far Left to be a blue/green. Go and eat hummus with Chloe Swarbrick. If you answered mainly ‘‘b’’, you will probably find that National or ACT is your choice. But if you answered mainly ‘‘c’’, you are a true blue/green. Get that bottle of expensive imported champagne out of your solar-powered fridge and celebrate.