One-way trips to oblivion: Sieg heil and black faces
I’m totally confused this week with the new normal. What started with the find of the century – a new planet that humans might be able to live on, if they could get there – ended with two contenders who I think should be first on a one-way trip. Guess who?
In fact, there will be others who have earned the trip, 110 light years into the future, but I’ll name a bunch of people and you decide who you want to send to planet oblivion-4-eva 2019.
OK, a clearly red-faced Juddy ‘‘Dark Days’’ Trudeau of Hypocrite Central, Vancouver, beat himself black and blue after discovering years and years of wokeish liberalism and an unrelenting commitment to PC-ism, women’s rights and gender neutral veges was just a front to get votes.
Actually his early life celebrated a vote-shy (apparently) pin-up boy hugging girls and looking like he’d been in a student orgy in front of a conga line of cheap Jamaican sunbed machines.
His voice broke into high notes each time a new photo emerged. I’m sure he would have felt no pain as he removed his testicles and backbone and said sorry for being born as a, hard to say it, as a, a, man.
Trudeau could have decided years ago to come out from the shadows but 10/10 from me for his performance in faking sincerity. What next? Trump hugs him and says all is forgiven? Watch the telly.
Our bud Helen Clark gets a mention for going all green and still thinking smokeee Aotearoa 2025 is achievable.
Jacinda Ardern would stop to chat but has been too busy ignoring Grant Robertson under the nosurprises policy to prove they never ever talked about anything.
Sonny Bill is not carrying an injury OK! And to prove that, he’s not in the starting XV.
Ardern again. C for China, as in Konnichiwa Beijing, nice to be here, excuse me I travel a bit. Are we in New Yorkland yet? I’m looking to avoid my former friend Justin.
Has Nigel Haworth gone? Face doesn’t fit any longer. I mean what’s wrong with a sham internal inquiry into rape claims? At least on her way out to China via Japan, Ardern repeated the failure all over again. A closed shop inquiry that won’t criticise her and will only report to her once no-one else can see it. A weak watery report is expected to criticise a person noone has heard of in the underworld.
Thank the world for Winston. Again he’s living proof this is an open and shut case of the most transparent politicians ever. If you can’t say what you went to hospital for, then what can you say?
Stu Nash texted to say don’t forget about him. I said Walter, don’t get yourself in a Stu.
John Tamihere grabbed another defeat from within his own mouth. Auckland has a choice, folks, so is Shadbolt keen or do we weep and demand Sir Bob Harvey do another glorious three years?
Did I forget Phil? No, Twyford isnt running.
Steve said have a beer, don’t worry.
Winston got up off his old rugby injury and said he’s fit to start . . . the second half. He’ll be a bit late, though.
Rugby injury? True, true. Let’s just say it. Sounds true.
Me too, said Jacinda. Me too . . . seriously, Jacinda, me too requires actions and you paying interest. Passing interest will never cut it.
Sonny Bill is not carrying an injury OK! And to prove that, he’s not in the starting XV.