Finally back in her happy place after running took over her life
Afew years ago, stressed out from work, Rachel Smalley scrambled around in the back of her wardrobe, and pulled out an old pair of trainers.
It was the start of a love affair with running that took her from Beirut to Boston.
But it would eventually take a toll on her health.
‘‘I’d become so addicted to it,’’ she says.
With the help of specialists, she’s now back to good health, and she’s now back to running, but with a new attitude, and a hope that her experience can help others, especially women, find a healthy relationship with something she still loves.
‘‘I often wonder and worry about what my life would be like if I hadn’t put on those dodgy old trainers that day and decided I needed to run for stress, because it really is such a gift,’’ says Smalley.
‘‘It doesn’t matter how fast or how far you run. If you move, then you’re a runner. And, you know, isn’t this just such a beautiful community? I’ve met so many great people through running and so many great personalities.’’
Smalley joined us on the Dirt Church Radio podcast this week, to tell co-host Matt Rayment and me about her running life.
But, of course, running isn’t separate from life, it’s part of life. It entwines itself into our regular routine, helps us through times of tension and worry, and can give us soaring highs and crashing lows.
For Smalley, running has helped her through the sudden death of her father, enabled her to bring attention to the plight of refugees, and taken her to some of the most famous events in the world.
And it all began with that realisation she was too stressed out.
A former journalist and broadcaster who’s now involved in strategic communications, Smalley was a well-known
face on television for years.
‘‘I wasn’t really coping with the stress of media deadlines,’’ she says. ‘‘You’d be in this uptight state all day, racing around trying to arrange interviews and get things in the can, as we used to say.
‘‘I’d end up being like a coiled spring with really tight shoulders and a sore stomach. And I couldn’t sleep. It was madness, really.’’
Having realised she had to do something, she found those shoes in the wardrobe, and went outside.
‘‘And I took off as most people do, I think, when they first start running. You go off at a cracking pace. I think I probably ran about two lampposts before I pulled over to dry retch.’’
But she kept going, getting a bit further each time until she could eventually run five kilometres, a milestone she vividly remembers.
‘‘Just the euphoria that I had made it. It was like running the length of New Zealand that I finally managed to pull off this five kilometre distance over a period of months.’’
Her first marathon was in Beirut, a race she’d organised to take part in to draw attention to the plight of Syrian refugees.
For first marathons, it was certainly unusual.
‘‘They clear every car out of the city, and then on the water, on the Mediterranean, the Lebanese military is there with a massive Navy boat with the guns pointing at [the city]. I mean, you’ve never been safer in your life.’’
She started to run marathon after marathon – one year she ran seven, ‘‘which is nuts’’.
After the Boston Marathon once, she flew straight back to New Zealand, jumped on a domestic flight to Queenstown and the next day ran the Routeburn Classic, a tough 32-kilometre trail race.
Her body began to suffer. ‘‘My hair started falling out, my nails got really brittle, and my brain fade was appalling. And I ended up, you know, your periods stop, everything grinds to a halt.’’
Smalley’s body fat had become dangerously low.
‘‘Anybody has to be careful but, in particular, it’s women. You really can’t afford to let your body fat get too low because the implications are huge. They really are.’’
It took the intervention of specialists – from nutritionists to endocrinologists – to help her get her health back.
‘‘And that’s kind of where I am in the last six months. I think I’ve found myself back in a happy place.’’
She’s still running, but far less than she was. ‘‘I’m certainly slower, my heart rate is so much lower now.’’
Now she doesn’t dream of racing at big international marathons around the world – she wants to support local events, especially as they struggle after coronavirus.
‘‘I really want to line up and support some of these events because they’ve given me so much enjoyment and strength, and so many lessons in life.
‘‘So I haven’t quite hung up my competitive shoes yet, but I certainly won’t be running fast.’’
Running has been a gift in my life, too. But you have to learn to respect it, and listen to it.
Eugene Bingham and Matt Rayment are hosts of a trail running podcast Dirt Church Radio. Learn more at dirtchurch radio.com or get in touch via email dirtchurchradio@gmail.com