Refuge walks alongside women fleeing violence
Five years ago, Olivia* was unaware her relationship was abusive. It was not until she broke up with her partner, and he started stalking her, that she called the police.
She was referred to Wellington Women’s Refuge, the start of a journey which helped her come to terms that it was more than stalking. That the emotional, sexual and physical violence she had faced was abuse.
Today Olivia is back on her feet and, social work degree in hand, is working at the refuge.
‘‘It feels a bit like a full circle, I came through this organisation, and because of it, I wanted to become a social worker, and wanted to come back here where they helped me.’’
The Wellington Women’s Refuge manager, Philippa McAtee, says one of the biggest misconceptions about the refuge is that it is just a safe house.
‘‘We’re a professional, specialist domestic violence organisation, where individuals can come, talk about their situation in confidence, be
It takesavillage believed and supported and feel empowered. We very much walk alongside women on the journey to be free from abuse.’’
Work includes recommending women-friendly organisations and lawyers, walking women through the police process, and helping them apply for a benefit.
‘‘It’s pretty scary for someone doing this for the first time, navigating all of this,’’ she says.
Wellington has two refuges: Te Whare Rokiroki-Ma¯ori Women’s Refuge and Wellington’s Women’s Refuge.
The two organisations work closely with each other, sharing an office, services like the crisis hotline and donations.
Ange Chaney, the kaiwhakahaere of Te Whare Rokiroki, says that having a specialised service gives wha¯nau a space to come to, where people already understand the layers of struggle and oppression that Ma¯ori women experience.
‘‘We get the systemic racism, we get how difficult it is to go to flat viewings if you’re Ma¯ori and you have a couple of little kids,’’ she says.
This year, Covid-19 threw the
refuge an added challenge as more women accessed their services at the start and end of lockdown.
But it also saw the best of Wellington, from community members doing supermarket runs and dropping off masks, to
Air New Zealand ensuring one woman had safe access out of the city when she needed it.
‘‘That was a hard, challenging time, but after that experience I actually felt uplifted, like encouraged, I just didn’t realise everyone really cared about us so much and was behind us so much,’’ Chaney says.
It was that level of support that the refuge is hoping Wellingtonians will show them this December.
Each year, they connect with the women they have supported over the year, to check in and give them a Christmas parcel.
‘‘It’s not unusual for us to turn up at somebody’s home with our Christmas gift, and
bring people to tears,’’ Chaney says.
It’s an experience Natasha* knows too well.
Five years ago, after years of escalating abuse, her partner knocked her out. Police were called, and she was referred to Women’s Refuge.
The next few days felt chaotic. She went from no-one knowing about the years of abuse she had suffered, to packing a bag forher kids and herself, and moving in with her father. The refuge helped her at each step.
She sat her kids down and explained that Christmas would be quiet that year.
‘‘That’s when Wellington Women’s Refuge gave me a call, and said, ‘Oh look, we’ve got some stuff here that’s been donated to us that we would like to pass on to the kids for Christmas’, and they turned up, and it was Christmas, it definitely was.’’
* Names changed to protect the women’s privacy.
Every Wednesday until Christmas, we will be telling you about a group in our region that is trying to make a difference on a shoestring budget, and we will be telling you how you can support them, if that’s something you can and want to do. You can read all the stories at stuff.co.nz/ xmasappeal