From one busy parent to another
Dear Jacinda and Clarke, Congratulations! This baby news is so fantastic. And considering you were told this happy news may never happen, I bet it’s really special.
The emotions will be hard to settle. That’s as it should be. Your lives are about to significantly change again. 2017 Prime Minister, 2018 first time Mum and Dads. I’m nervous for you. And excited. Shut out the critics. This is your life. It’s full enough.
#FirstBabyNZ won’t know it yet, but the little tot is going to be one seriously photographed child.
Protect the little cherub as much as you can. This is not a normal situation. Set the rules and expectations early. I actually have faith that most of the New Zealand media won’t step over the line.
I bet you both got a sense of shock ‘n awe when you heard the news! ‘Yes we did it’, now what? What if I’m Prime Minister?! Well, that’s answered. You are. Things will fall into place.
It’s OK to be grumpy, exhausted and nervous. You’ll have questions that can’t be answered but solutions become clear or not. Clarke, you may find yourself driving bubba across the harbour bridge at midnight so he or she can sleep. Trust me, it’s normal.
Also Clarke, the fishing will sadly go on hold for now, but it returns.
Don’t forget to make time for each other, have date nights and all that. Taking time for each other matters more than ever. Do what you need to do. Stay in, turn off the phones. Take the sleep when you can. Don’t watch the Blues rugby side. Say no.
Clarke, it sounds like you’ll be lead care-giver, otherwise known as Dad. Respect. It’s a massive role and responsibility.
My little guy, Buster, is aged 7 and barely leaves my side.
It can be exhausting but my heart is full of pride. There’s nothing more rewarding in the world.
Bullrush, lego, sushi snacks, $2 dollar shop visits, pig hunting, league, rugby and fishing. And work. Then again the next day. Do stuff, create memories, teach and listen. I pick my son up from school every day. I stand there smiling. It’s the ultimate privilege. I live not far from you, if you ever want a chat or drink.
Don’t forget to put the phone down if you can; I failed my kids when it came to that. They remind me.
You’ll need family members and helpers close by. You’ll soon work out which ones you can rely on.
Jacinda, I’m sure you have plenty of advisers, but I urge you to take six months instead of six weeks. Only the world’s most miserable of meanies would object. Anyway, you do what you think is right. You have made a serious statement in office, hordes of people from our generation sit alongside you in support of you taking a longer break. Winston’s got this.
And one final thing – blink and you miss it. They grow up so quickly. It’s fleeting. Next minute, there’s a job, a phone, a new demand, a bad hair day. Make sure you don’t miss it.
Cheers, Duncan