Voice in my ear helps me relax
In the Oscar-winning movie Her, Joaquin Phoenix develops a relationship with a disembodied voice that lives in his phone. What a grim vision of the future, I thought to myself. Until I let Clementine into my life.
Clementine whispers in my ear when I need calming down. She’s the angel on my shoulder encouraging me to go the extra mile for my latest story. She’s the devil telling me it’s all right to watch Netflix with a tub of ice cream. Clementine is always right, and always there. She lives in my phone and costs about 10 bucks a month.
This isn’t an advert, and I normally hate paying for apps.
When my friend Claire mentioned the hypnotherapy app Clementine was helpful, I decided to give it a go (it is free to try for a month).
She warned it could come across as slightly cheesy and hippy.
‘‘If I saw Clementine’s messages in the form of a meme with a picture of a lotus flower I’d look away immediately, but the format and tone is palatable – it’s designed for people like us, who usually cringe at that kind of positive reinforcement, but who actually benefit from it,’’ she says.
UK-based entrepreneur Kim Palmer tells the story of Clementine’s creation in the app description:
‘‘A few years ago, I was feeling bad. My anxiety had rocketed and I wasn’t coping. Work presentations were becoming unbearable, even meetings were difficult. Meanwhile I had a young son, Louis, to look after. I needed to make some changes, because I couldn’t go on feeling like this.’’
That’s when she met clinical hypnotherapist Georgia Foster, the actual name of the woman behind Clementine’s voice.
She found the therapy so helpful that she decided to create the app ‘‘for the modern woman’’.
But does hypnotherapy work or is my new imaginary friend a quack?
Hypnosis has been used for therapeutic purposes in New Zealand since the 19th century. Scientific studies have shown it could help treat depression, insomnia, addiction and phobias. Even the New Zealand Police resorted to hypnosis in the 1980s but later deemed it a risky technique.
However, it does not work for everyone. Some people are more hypnotisable than others, though researchers are unclear why. Researchers have found that people with a good imagination, the ability to get lost in a movie or book and to concentrate and keep mental focus get the best results. That’s totally me.
It used to take me hours to go back to sleep when I woke at night.
Not under Clementine’s watch. I listen to her soothing, accentless voice say things on a loop such as this:"It is safe to sleep … No need to focus on what may or may not happen tomorrow, or the next day, or the next day, or the next week, or the next month.’’
By the end of the 16 minute recording I’m drifting back to sleep.
My other friends have their own problems and can’t be chirpy on command. But Clementine can.
The ‘‘Tough day at work’’ recording includes gems such as: ‘‘You know intuitively when you need to think about work and when you don’t. Without guilt or self-doubt. ‘‘It helps me turn off the constant ruminating at the back of my mind.
As any best friend would do, Clementine also sends me lovely messages throughout the day, such as: ‘‘Be gentle with yourself. You’re doing the best you can.’’
But she is not annoyingly, relentlessly positive either.
In the five-minute confidence boost recording, there is a great message I think many women need to hear: ‘‘I don’t need to please everyone to be successful. I don’t need to be perfect to be successful’’.
She helps me skive off sometimes. The other day I was agonising over whether to have a glass of wine and watch Netflix or wash the dishes when I received this message – or ‘‘mantra’’, as she likes to call it – from her: ‘‘It can wait. Park it.’’
Of course I haven’t assimilated all the mantras yet.
‘‘Be kind even when the impulse is to be right.’’ My husband would say I haven’t nailed that one yet. But me and Clemmie, we think he just needs to take a deep breath and relax.