Life when the cameras
If you’re thinking of signing up to a reality show, you must understand that the success of Bachelor NZ couple Art and Matilda is the exception, not the rule.
For many, life after the reality TV spotlight fades is not car sponsorship deals, free holidays and PR gifts – it’s a harsh reality check.
‘‘It’s so easy to go sit at the Viaduct all day and drink, but that costs money, and at the moment there isn’t much going in,’’ says Gareth Noble, from this year’s Married At First Sight NZ.
With fellow participant Wayne McIntosh, Noble recently relocated to Auckland to ‘‘pursue new opportunities,’’ but both are unemployed.
‘‘We haven’t run out of money yet,’’ says Noble. ‘‘But once we’ve had a few beers, we’re not that controlled with what we’re spending – and in Auckland you can just go out every day.’’
Over a couple of beers, the pair tell me about the inevitable post-fame low that hit them after Married At First Sight wrapped up, and how they relied on each other to avoid ‘‘getting depressed’’.
McIntosh, who quit his job as a helicopter engineer to be on the show, says not having employment after it finished sent him into a ‘‘real low’’.
‘‘When you’re on the show you’re in a bubble, you’re on a high and everything’s exciting,’’ says McIntosh.
‘‘Then once it’s over and you’re ‘nothing’, that low comes pretty quick and you become fixated on ‘What’s next? What am I going to do?’’
While the pair are enjoying the ‘‘perks’’ of their 15 minutes of fame, they are acutely aware that this special treatment won’t last for long.
‘‘We get invited to movie premieres here and there, and for us it’s so enjoyable,’’ says Noble, who previously lived in Cromwell.
‘‘We’re realistic though,’’ says McIntosh. ‘‘We know it’s going to wear off, but for now we’re happy with free beers.’’
Emily Blanchett from this season of The Block NZ has recently relocated from Palmerston North to Auckland.
Also unemployed, Blanchett is open about her struggles with trying to go back to her ‘‘normal life’’ after the show finished.
‘‘When you’re on the show you’re the centre of attention. You get treated like you’re the most famous person, and then you have to go back to normal life,’’ she says.
‘‘I tried to go back to work, back to my normal life but I was just craving more. I’m lucky in that I work in my family business, but after being on TV it just didn’t feel like enough any more.
‘‘You get a taste for it, that excitement – and it’s kind of yuck how self-obsessed you get. I think I got way too caught up in
wanting to be this big shot, wanting to be this TV star.’’
Blanchett is now eagerly pursuing a career in television.
‘‘I’m chasing another TV gig, maybe a TV hosting gig. I’m walking around like a lost cause at the moment though, just hoping it’s going to fall into my lap. I feel really lost but I’m trying to stay positive that something will fall into place for me.’’
Haydn Daniels, another former MAFS star, felt let down by MediaWorks after the show. ‘‘It is really hard because you go from being the flavour of the month with the TV network, but then as soon as they don’t need you any more you’re thrown away.
‘‘You’re chucked out to fend for yourself, unless you’re Brett and Angel [MAFS couple from season one] and they need you to promote the next season.’’
Unlike the others, Daniels has no interest in trying to stay in the limelight.
‘‘I didn’t go on the show for fame and fortune. I’m not out there on Instagram flogging products, I don’t go to events, it’s not really my thing. I just wanted to get back to my normal life.’’
Daniels says he now suffers anxiety and depression, and sees a therapist regularly.
‘‘I’d never experienced anxiety before the show, and all of a sudden I was constantly looking over my shoulder, worried about what was going to be coming next. I also had so much built-up anger from being on the show that I had to try to accept, and move on.’’
His advice to anyone thinking of going on a reality show is to make sure you have a good support network.
‘‘You can feel really alone. The producers say duty of care is their No 1 priority, but that’s obviously not true. Their priority is ratings.’’
A MediaWorks spokesperson rejects Daniels’ assertions. ‘‘Duty of care for all participants across our reality TV portfolio is, and has always been, paramount. Before signing up participants are fully briefed on what to expect from the show and the pressures that may come with that.
‘‘We are in constant communication with participants throughout filming and all have access to independent psychological support if required,’’ says the spokesperson.
‘‘We also have a team who work alongside participants on social media and support them with this, including moderating our own social pages and removing comments that are abusive, offensive or threatening.’’
Dani Robinson from the first season of The Bachelor NZ managed to avoid the postreality show emotional and financial comedown.
‘‘In terms of going back to my ‘normal life’ after the show ended, I was fine because I’m very career driven. Also, everyone saw me getting my heart broken on TV so being able to get away from the show was a good thing for me,’’ she says.
While she admits she did enjoy the ‘‘free perks’’ of her Bachelor fame, she says she didn’t need to rely on them because she ‘‘already had a nice lifestyle’’.
‘‘That was the best part for me because I got given lots of opportunities, and I got to go on overseas trips. ’’
Robinson, who has more than 42,000 Instagram followers, says she has been able to succeed at ‘‘staying relevant’’ because of her career in marketing, and the fact that she ‘‘gets it’’.
Despite her own success, she wants anyone considering applying to be on a reality TV show to think long and hard about it.
‘‘What did you want to be when you were little? Surely you had bigger aspirations than being a reality star. This is not what we wanted for ourselves,’’ she says.
‘‘Yes, you get cool perks, but this isn’t a future. This isn’t a lifestyle that’s sustainable long term. I think if people realised this before they got themselves into this, they would be much better off.
‘‘If you get into this wanting fame or wanting attention, you are going to be disappointed. Because it doesn’t last.’’
‘‘Once it’s over and you’re ‘nothing’, that low comes pretty quick and you become fixated on ‘What’s next? What am I going to do’.’’ Wayne McIntosh