It takes more than parents to raise kids
There was a time when parenting was simple. Or at least it appeared that way. Traditionally, the father went out to work each day while the mother stayed at home to raise the children and keep the house.
It was a standard stereotypical labour divide that, for many, was a perfect solution to that small issue of having to earn money so you could afford to have a house and/or children.
Fast forward a few years and you’re likely to find both parents employed. So they’ll be trying to juggle demanding jobs, the never-ending needs of children, and the successful running of a household (which as we all know can be challenging with toddlers), with having a life. Little wonder there are a few stressed folk running around.
But this column isn’t meant to be a critique of the modern world bemoaning the lives we choose to lead. It’s actually about saying thanks to a special bunch of people who have played an important and significant role in raising my children.
Whether you agree or disagree with it or believe parents should be at home with children, there’s no question that early childhood education has become an essential part of modern life. It’s enabled parents to be able to return to work so they can afford a) to be able to provide for them and b) to have a life that they’d like.
We chose to send ours to preschool. It was a difficult decision. Were we doing the right thing? What impact would it have on them? Would it help or hinder them? Thankfully, it’s been awesome for them.
Every weekday morning for almost four years I’ve walked into the same room with my catchcry ‘‘waddup gangstas’’ (a sad way of trying to stay hip with the youngsters), chatted with the adults in the room and talked to the little ones who come over to say hi. Or use my legs to stand up. Or want a hug.
For the past year Piper and I have had the same routine – I open her schoolbag, we get out her lunchbox, she takes off her jacket and we put it in. She puts the yoghurt in the fridge and I lift her up so she can put her lunchbox on the shelf.
She then takes her bag – it used to be by dragging, now she can carry it – to hang it on the hook. There’s more general chit-chat, some hugs and cuddles, and I head off to work.
It’s been my fairly standard routine for longer than Piper has been alive because I did the same thing with Zach. It’s my morning thing. It’s what I do.
But now it’s over. And it feels weird. Piper has graduated into the next room so the closest I get to the old one is peering through the windows and waving (I know they miss me).
Now we’re developing a new routine, in a new room, with new people (who are wonderful by the way, don’t get me wrong).
But that day-to-day interaction with Stacey, Hilary, Sonya, Emma and Bobbi won’t be there. Sure, it’s their job and what they’re paid to do but each day these five have played a vital role in helping to mould and shape Piper into the strong, confident and independent little girl that she’s become. They’ve helped teach her manners, encouraged good behaviour, shown her how to share and play with others, picked her up when she’s fallen, comforted her when she’s got upset and cuddled her when she’s got sick. They’ve changed more of her nappies than you could ever count, cleaned her up when she’s had an accident, fed her and then helped her to feed herself, and given her the support and self-confidence she’s needed to grow and develop.
They’ve been her second family and they’ve loved her as one of their own and for that we’re grateful. The Piper we know and love features their best qualities and teachings.
So thanks ‘‘gangstas’’.
Mark Hotton is a journalist and father of two who worried that he’s starting to get beaten at I-Spy by his 4-year-old son.