Wanted: One miracle

OPINION: Yup, the very nature of Twitter is that it is short and to the point, but even by those standards a tweet last Saturday from an Australian sports fan known as the Maitland Mumbler was ... pointed.

‘‘If you want to have your heart kicked in the nuts for 26 weeks a year,’’ he opined, ’’be a Knights supporter #NRLDragonKnights’’. Touche! In this particular instance it was because the Knights had got to a 28-10 lead over the Dragons at Jubilee Oval, and it really looked as if they might be emerging from their annus horribilis ... only for the Saints to roar back for a 32-28 victory!

So, yes, Maitland Mumbler, we ummmm, feel for you. But being a Wallabies supporter these days is, if not quite having your heart kicked in the nuts that often, at least a rather less violent version of it.

While it is one thing to have lost and struggled against lesser teams, now looming on the horizon are the mighty All Blacks. See, straight after the Wallabies fell over the line against Italy, we tuned in to see the New Zealanders take on a worthy British and Irish Lions side and stomp them, romp them, bash them, smash them, eat them, BEAT them ... 30-15.

And us Wallabies supporters, Mumbler? We were thinking that if our blokes are struggling against Italy, and have already lost to a Scottish side denuded of its Lions, just what will the All Blacks do to us? People have been talking of a 40-point drubbing, a 50-point drubbing, and worse!

At least however, coach Michael Cheika still believes. ’’If I don’t back them, then what is there?’’ he said this week.

‘‘We must have the ambition. I believe it. That’s where it’s got to start hasn’t it? I don’t blame people based on what’s happened this year overall, whether it be in Super Rugby or in our games here. I don’t blame people if they wouldn’t believe in us. We’ve got to show it on the field and we will.’’ Bravo! And he’s right. The last time a miracle that big happened, a huge star appeared in the east. But there really is some chance, if we take our chances. Which brings me to my point.

Cheika will likely have already watched the first Lions test five times, but even on one viewing, one thing is obvious. The only hope for the Wallabies is to pick a side that actually can compete with them in the set-pieces and rolling mauls. His starting point has to be to get a scrum that will hold and a lineout that will hold its own. In the forwards, select conservatively so that, whatever else, we will get some ball.

And then pick the wildcards in the backs! Take our chances. Pick the most quixotic talents we’ve got in the hope that, on the day, the chemistry will take hold, beat their physics, pull off some poetry in motion, and make HISTORY!

Or something like that.