SC Rugby boss tells his own story of violence
A provincial rugby boss is taking the brave step of revealing the very personal toll domestic violence has taken on his life.
South Canterbury Rugby Union chief executive Craig Calder spoke for the first time about the abuse inflicted by his father at the launch of New Zealand Rugby’s (NZR) Te Hurihanga programme on Monday.
The programme aimed to educate players across all levels on healthy relationships, domestic violence, child protection, sexual assault, consent and bystander responsibility, while building supportive environments to ‘‘positively shift attitudes’’ within our national game.
Te Hurihanga has evolved from NZR’s Respect and Responsibility review work which began in early 2017, following a series of off-field player scandals.
‘‘From a personal point of view, deep in my heart – I’ve never really talked about it until today that I come from a family violence background,’’ Calder said.
‘‘My father was an alcoholic. I’ve seen him attack my mother, I’ve seen him attack my sister.
‘‘It affected me deeply as a child growing up, particularly around school age. I learned a lot from it, so that’s why I’m pretty passionate about this project.’’
Calder was behind his union’s ‘‘Stand Up!’’ pilot programme – one of three provincial unions involved in developing Te Hurihanga.
While raising awareness on these issues would be seen as positive by most, Calder admitted there was early resistance.
‘‘A lot of them thought I was from Mars when I first introduced it . . . to be honest, a lot were a bit sceptical. A lot of them thought I was attacking their rugby clubs and not attacking what was a community problem, but they soon came on board.’’
The Respect and Responsibility programme came about following a review into a succession of off-field incidents which attracted a high level of public scrutiny in 2016.
Among them was the Chiefs’ infamous Mad Monday celebrations dubbed ‘‘Strippergate’’ and the Losi Filipo assault saga.
However, confusion over the links to that review has prompted NZR to rebrand it to Te Hurihanga – widening it out to players from grassroots up.