Spray and walk away is not good enough
It would have been dead easy, wouldn’t it? A piece of cake. Lurking unobtrusively behind one of those chunky pillars. No problem, surely, to avoid the attention of hotel staff anticipating the imminent arrival of another group of returning travellers bound for managed isolation.
Listening to the conversation of the staff for hints as to where the new group was from. Working out whether one might be able to legitimately pass for a member of the party.
Perhaps lurking with a mask on, that would have been handy. They’re easy to find, aren’t they?
Then, when the bus pulled up and there was plenty of noise as the new arrivals were shepherded through the check-in processes, a bit of nifty footwork, and into the throng of weary travellers. Social distancing on the way in? No luggage except that backpack over the shoulder? No problem. Travelling light. From overseas. Just walk in like you own the place.
Temperature check on entry? All good. Listen to the nurse holding the temperature gun. Having sneaked an advance glance at the luggage tags on the suitcases, give one of those names. At least it’ll be on the hotel’s list. It could work, provided they’re further back in the queue. Imagine the questions the real Joe Blow will face when they get to him.
Up to the counter to get the keys to a room, home for the next fortnight. What if they want to see a passport? Hotels tend to. That could be tricky. Even if you had one, it wouldn’t have stamps in it, showing you’d just arrived back in the country. Maybe just try to sidle up to the counter and grab some keys while no-one’s looking, then jump in the lift. Get into the room, and stay there. What? Daily health checks?
OK, back to reality. There’s a part of me that fervently wishes the story of the homeless man spending a fortnight in managed isolation in an Auckland hotel was true, not the ‘‘urban legend’’ it seems virtually certain to be, despite Opposition health spokesman Michael Woodhouse’s insistence.
The idea of someone down on their luck – and doing it tough as winter settles in – enjoying a fortnight of respite from their harsh reality is a lovely thought. It’s why ‘‘he’’ became many average Kiwis’ favourite character in this troubling latest phase of our country’s Covid-19 response. It brought some lightness to a situation that has weighed heavily on us.
However, the many homeless people in our country living in motels, because of a longstanding lack of state houses, won’t be experiencing anything like the luxury he reputedly did, and I’m not sure they’d exactly have been laughing along.
The whole episode has raised some interesting questions about what our politicians introduce into the public arena, and the responsibility that goes with it. Let’s go back to when Woodhouse first raised the allegation, a move clearly aimed at painting the Government’s hitherto successful Covid-19 response as being in disarray.
He made it clear, as he had to, that he saw the source of the information as reliable, and called on the Government to investigate it, though he didn’t have to provide any proof of the incident. He would have known an investigation would involve considerable time and resources. However, when asked this week by Megan Woods, the minister responsible for isolation facilities, to provide backing for his claim, he said the fact the Government hadn’t dismissed the story as an urban myth, but had investigated it, showed it believed it might be true.
He hasn’t been in Woods’ position, though he is a former minister, but Woodhouse would absolutely have known that in a situation as serious as a pandemic, the Government had no choice. A breach of isolation protocols, with all its potential flow-on effects, was alleged. Winston Peters had it pretty spot-on when he told Woodhouse in Parliament this week, ‘‘spray and walk away won’t do’’.
Yes, there’s an election ahead, but this pandemic is an unprecedented situation for our country, and for all these politicians. What happened to the spirit of bipartisan co-operation that should be operating now?
One thing’s for sure. Whatever happens in September, we seriously need some new good health minister material. Perhaps I’m being unfair on him, given what’s happened since, but back in 2017, I felt we’d have to go a long way to find a health minister as apparently out of touch and aloof as Jonathan Coleman. I’m revising that position rapidly. David Clark simply can’t continue in the role long-term. With the greatest respect, and given he’s a Presbyterian minister, his performance of late feels light on humility. Woodhouse looks a terrible fit to me now too. The search is on.
I was amused by a view I saw this week that suggested the Government should just have ignored the claim, because there was no way to recover any money from the man. It could then have spent the money used on the investigation on getting its response right. If only.
But perhaps that’s how our cashstrapped district health boards should operate. Ignore those big capital charges owed to the Government and spend the money on, say, healthcare? Sounds legit.
We seriously need some new good health minister material . . . David Clark simply can’t continue in the role long-term. With the greatest respect, and given he’s a Presbyterian minister, his performance of late feels light on humility.