A peek at polygamy:
A new documentary series starting on TVNZ 2 this week takes a peek at polygamy. Kerry Harvey reports.
New documentary series goes inside a Mormon community.
Forget the lewd jokes. Polygamy is not for the fainthearted, says Will Anderson, the British executive producer of Three Wives, One Husband.
The four-part documentary is an eye-opening look at the families living at The Rock, a Utah Mormon community where two or three wives – and dozens of children – are the norm.
“The preconception we wanted to change,” says Anderson, “was that people thought they were going to be a bunch of religious weirdos living in caves when actually they’re active and capable members of society who organise themselves incredibly efficiently and, I think, much better perhaps than we do.
“Monogamy clearly doesn’t work brilliantly for everybody otherwise the divorce rates around the world wouldn’t be so high and people wouldn’t be having affairs all the time behind their partner’s back.”
Anderson and his crew were allowed unprecedented access to the community, installing cameras that captured day-to-day life in an intimate way.
The first episode – which centres on Enoch Foster and his courtship of a possible third wife – captures the home birth of his 17th baby, the baptism of several of his children, and the inevitable tensions between his wives – Lilian and Katrina.
Gaining residents’ trust was a long and slow process and a responsibility the production team took seriously.
“We went back several times over the course of about six months to get to know them and talk to them about the concerns they had,” Anderson says, adding filming took place over the course of a year.
“They decided they were only going to do it if it was a unanimous decision and happily it was.”
He says both he and his crew
“What they are fighting against is prejudice – the prejudice of people who don’t know them, who just think that all the women must be oppressed or brainwashed.” – Will Anderson
came away impressed – and changed – by what they saw.
“As they say in the film, you wouldn’t choose that lifestyle if you were looking for an easy time or you were just hoping you were going to get loads of sex. That’s not what drives it,” he adds.
“They are trying to take their own ego out of their relationships and they’re trying to love everybody else equally. I think it is really hard work.
“They spend a lot of their time working on their relationships and they really, really invest in them. I think all of us – well I certainly am – are guilty at times of focusing on work, or on other things and letting the relationship coast.
“They never do that and they can’t afford to because it’s much more complicated than the rest of us. I think it’s a massive commitment for them and they don’t go into it lightly and they take it very seriously.”
Anderson says he and his crew found The Rock lifestyle inspiring, particularly the family life.
“Their love for family is so infectious and so strong that all of us felt, I think, that we were missing out. There was something about their way of life that we all
envied,” he says, adding both he and producer Vicky Mitchell were inspired to add to their own families during that year of filming. However, it seems some viewers
were not won over. Three Wives, One
Husband caused controversy – and a social media storm – when it screened in Britain. “Some people saw good in it but others just judge it and don’t like it and weren’t prepared to give it the time of day,” Anderson says. “When the programmes were going out in the UK, and I was watching the reaction on social media, I understood for the first time the struggle The Rock community has in integrating into the wider society. “(Polygamy) has been made illegal and they now live under the threat of being arrested. “What they are fighting against is prejudice – the prejudice of people who don’t know them, who just think that all the women must be oppressed or brainwashed or whatever, whereas that wasn’t the experience that I found. “Those are not the people I met yet people are quick to judge when they don’t know them.”