Waikato Times

The captivatin­g lives of cows (and one human) revealed

A documentar­y in the New Zealand Internatio­nal Film Festival investigat­es the story of a Waikato man who bought two cows as pets.

- Mike Mather reports.

Most people probably don’t know that when cows are happy they smile, and often do a little happy dance. These are among the beefy revelation­s of When the Cows Come Home, a featurelen­gth documentar­y soon to make its debut in the New Zealand Internatio­nal Film Festival later this month.

The film is both an expose´ of the secret life of cows and a portrait of a man who, through a combinatio­n of personal tragedy, mental unwellness, weird circumstan­ce and ‘‘one terrible faux pas’’, ended up living on his parents’ farm in the Waikato in his late 50s, looking after a small herd.

It was there that Andrew Johnstone made an unexpected connection with one of the cows in the beef herd.

‘‘This cow just walked straight up to me and gave me a bunt. That was Tilly.’’

Johnstone formed what could be described as a firm friendship with the brave and surprising­ly intelligen­t bovine.

The majority of New Zealanders likely see cows as a bunch of dull-witted creatures that hang around in fields eating grass – simple biological units that comprise the basis of the country’s largest industry. But each animal has its own place in the hierarchy of the herd, its own best friend, and its own personalit­y – and as Johnstone found, the cow he dubbed Tilly had personalit­y in abundance.

‘‘We just see cows and think they are standing around doing nothing, but there’s much more to them than meets the eye. They actually lead quite busy lives. They want to have fun and are constantly in search of novelty.’’

When it came time, Johnstone could not bear the thought of sending Tilly off to the meatworks. So he decided to keep her as a pet.

However, with very little in the way of riches, it was a task not easily accomplish­ed – so he crowdfunde­d via Facebook and managed to buy not only Tilly, but a second cow called Maggie to keep her company.

When the Cows Come Home provides audiences with a revealing insight into Johnstone’s life on the rural idyll and his frequently joyous time spent with Tilly and Maggie.

‘‘Cows dance,’’ he reveals early on in the film. ‘‘That surprises a lot of people when they see it happening . . . We do lots of jigging [and] dancing around.

‘‘They throw their back legs in the air and click their heels . . . These cows dance when they are happy.’’

The documentar­y came about after filmmaker Costa Botes ‘‘accidental­ly’’ befriended Johnstone on Facebook – and soon became entranced by his eloquently-written posts about life on the farm.

‘‘I did ask him why he friended me, and he replied ‘I thought you were someone else’,’’ Johnstone laughs.

Botes is well known in New Zealand film-making circles, and first came to prominence in 1995 with Forgotten Silver, a mock-documentar­y co-written and codirected with Peter Jackson.

He has since become renowned as a documentar­y maker specialisi­ng in stories about individual­s in the grip of some kind of struggle or challenge, or with great passions. In Johnstone, he found both.

As Botes observes in the press notes for the film, ‘‘[Johnstone’s] writing is very engaging. Somehow, he manages to make mundane topics like grass growth interestin­g.

‘‘Andrew’s posts first caught my attention when I read about the cow he was trying to adopt. . . I thought there might be an amusing bovine soap opera in the making.’’

Botes met Johnstone and began filming. But as he got to know the human subject of his documentat­ion, the focus of the story began to shift.

‘‘It was on his third visit when he told me ‘It’s not a film about your cows any more. It’s about you’,’’ Johnstone said.

It was a canny decision. To say Johnstone was a colourful character with a colourful past would be an understate­ment. He’s been – and in some aspects still is – a musician, artist, journalist, and sales manager before becoming a manager of herds. His history is littered with triumphs and tragedies in equal measure. They include taking on the authoritar­ian leadership at one of the country’s prestigiou­s Marist schools; a horrific incident from his childhood; and living every journalist’s nightmare and briefly becoming nationally vilified after making a major misjudgmen­t that appeared in print.

When the Cows Come Home makes its debut in the Internatio­nal Film Festival in Auckland on Sunday, July 31.

It will screen in Hamilton at the Lido Cinema on August 20, 21 and 23.

Further details, including more screening times, can be found on the film festival website.

‘‘[Johnstone’s] writing is very engaging. Somehow, he manages to make mundane topics like grass growth interestin­g’’ Filmmaker Costa Botes

 ?? ?? When the Cows Come Home is a documentar­y that is a portrait of Waikato musician, artist, journalist and farmer Andrew Johnstone, who through a mix of personal tragedy and one terrible mistake found himself living back on his parents’ farm in his late 50s — where he made a surprising connection.
When the Cows Come Home is a documentar­y that is a portrait of Waikato musician, artist, journalist and farmer Andrew Johnstone, who through a mix of personal tragedy and one terrible mistake found himself living back on his parents’ farm in his late 50s — where he made a surprising connection.
 ?? ?? Andrew Johnstone: ‘‘They actually lead quite busy lives. They want to have fun and are constantly in search of novelty.’’
Andrew Johnstone: ‘‘They actually lead quite busy lives. They want to have fun and are constantly in search of novelty.’’
 ?? ?? To paraphrase noted philosophe­r Bart Simpson, “Don’t have a cow, man.” Andrew Johnstone ended up having two.
To paraphrase noted philosophe­r Bart Simpson, “Don’t have a cow, man.” Andrew Johnstone ended up having two.

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