We're Better Than This

In May the Herald launched We’re Better Than This, a campaign focusing on family violence in New Zealand.

Our campaign centres on men’s violence towards women and started with an eight- day series looking at the causes, victims, abusers and the people working hard to curb the epidemic.

Today we are taking another look at family violence over the festive period.

The term family violence encompasses intimate partner violence, child abuse, elder abuse and the abuse of disabled people within families.

But in New Zealand, by far the most significant of all family violence is men abusing women. One in three women will be subjected to physical or sexual violence from a partner at some point in their lives.

The message of our campaign is simple: we can and must do better than this New Zealand.

Victims — you deserve better. Abusers — you need to be better. And every one of us can do better when it comes to looking out for our friends, neighbours, colleagues and even strangers.

So far our campaign has been highly successful. During and after the initial series, calls for help to refuge crisis lines spiked across the she tried to leave. Her ex- husband was violent towards both women and tried to physically block Kate leaving the house. Her sister called 111.

“I don’t think I would have got out if someone else hadn’t rung. I was too country. At Shine, the phones were “going crazy”.

Police are now using # betterthanthis videos to train staff in the area of family violence.

One woman was motivated to leave her abusive partner and credits the Herald with saving her life.

A man who read the series realised he had been treating his partner badly. He made an attempt to get help. The partner left him the same day, not knowing and he has since been working on improving the way he treats women.

We have been contacted by countless educators, health professionals and other people saying that our articles have been printed and put in doctors’ surgeries, counselling waiting rooms, police stations.

We are confident our message is reaching the very people it needs to. But we can still do better — particularly over the Christmas and New Year period, when family violence spikes across the country.

Over the next few days we will hear from victims, abusers and the dedicated police and support agencies working every day against the epidemic of family violence. New Zealand, we are better than this. scared. I think there are so many women out there that will be the same. It’s so hard,” she said.

Not long after, she woke up on December 25 in a safe house.

“There were t wo distinct

Phone the police on 111 or ask neighbours of friends to ring for you.

Run outside and head for where there are other people.

Scream for help so that neighbours can hear you. Take the children with you. Don’t stop to get anything else. If you are being abused, remember it’s not your fault. Violence is never okay.

Women’s Refuge: Free national crisis line operates 24/ 7. Ph: 0800 refuge or 0800 733 843; online: womensrefuge. org. nz

Shine, free national helpline 9am- 11pm every day. Ph: 0508 744 633; online: 2shine. org. nz

It’s Not Ok. Ph: 0800 456 450; online: areyouok. org. nz

Shakti: specialist cultural services for African, Asian and Middle Eastern women and their children. Crisis line 24/ 7. Ph: 0800 742 584

Ministry of Justice: justice. govt. nz/ family- justice/ domestic- violence

National Network of Stopping Violence: nnsvs. org. nz

White Ribbon: Aiming to eliminate men’s violence towards women, focusing this year on sexual violence and the issue of consent. Online: whiteribbon. org. nz emotions. One was just incredible, incredible relief. But it was also very sad . . . I was in a place where I didn’t live; this wasn’t my home I had no family around me apart from my daughter — but it was safe. It was quite foreign but