Strangest contract incentives
“sixth starter” to a rapturous ovation at the American Airlines Center, warming up on the court and sitting on the bench while his family and a dozen former Cowboys teammates watched on in the stands.
Some thought it all rather odd; treatment usually reserved for kids from the Make- A- Wish Foundation being afforded to a multimillionaire.
But Romo was a hero to Dallas throughout his 14- year playing career, putting his body through the wringer in an ultimately unsuccessful chase for a championship.
And, given he decided to retire after the football season, why not give the locals a chance to pay tribute, especially given the Mavericks were long ago ruled out of playoff contention?
It might have been a little different, though, had Mavericks owner Mark Cuban got his way.
The outspoken billionaire reportedly wanted to turn Romo’s make- believe into reality, lobbying the league to allow the quarterback a chance to get on court.
According to ESPN, NBA commissioner Adam Silver told Cuban any contract given to Romo wouldn’t be honoured, and that might indeed have been taking the sideshow too far. As it was, Cuban still heard the complaints, rebuffing them with a salient reminder of what his business was offering.
“Anybody who thinks a lay- up line is disrespectful hasn’t watched an NBA game,” Cuban said. “We’ve got people shooting half- court shots at every break, we’ve got kids for ball boys. We’re entertainment.”
Exactly right. And Romo playing Maverick for a day is quality entertainment. Tuesday in the United States was National Pet Day. Tuesday was also the Miami Marlins’ first home game of the new baseball season. And, at Marlins Park, those two events came together in rather amusing fashion.
Just before the sixth inning of the clash between the home team and Atlanta Braves, someone’s pet decided to celebrate the occasion and storm the field, causing a significant delay while it roamed the outfield and remained out of reach of pursuing security staff.
The elusive grey moggie soon found its way to the centre- field wall and scaled it in style, climbing into the stadium’s home run sculpture, a garish monstrosity that lights up, spins and spews smoke whenever the home team hit a dinger. And then, while the game resumed, it just sat there.
“The first thing I was thinking — bad luck,” Marlins centre fielder Marcell Ozuna told MLB. com.
“Every time I came out for defence, I looked at the cat out there, hiding its head into the thing. I'm thinking, ‘ What are you doing out there?' The last inning, I don't see it. I didn't know where he'd go.”
Where would it go, indeed. While the Marlins’ Twitter account made the most of their new spectator, greeting their side’s scoring with quality puns like “How do you like us meow?!”, the rest of social media began to wonder: what would happen to the poor kitty if the Marlins smacked a homer?
But just when Pet Day threatened to meet a grisly end, the Marlins made the sensible call, tweeting, “We have suspended use of our home run sculpture for the time being & are monitoring # RallyCat, who appears to be safe at the moment.”
As far as we know, the cat eventually escaped with eight of its lives, leaving the Marlins to celebrate a successful start to their home season: “Our # OpeningNight attendance: 36,519 humans + one cat.” Portland Trail Blazers forward Maurice Harkless entered the final game of the NBA season determined to not make a three- pointer. And while it was meaningless, given the Blazers had already locked up a playoff spot, that seemed a stance contrary to the idea of basketball.
But Harkless had 500,000 reasons for his sudden reticence. The 23- year- old’s contract with Portland contained a specific provision this season: if he shot 35 per cent or better from deep, he would receive US$ 500,000. And since Harkless headed into the last day with a 35.1 per cent mark, even one miss could have cost him half a million dollars.
Asked pre- game whether he would take the risk, Harkless replied, “Would you?” And sure enough, he stayed inside the arc, finishing the game with 11 points and finishing the season with a nice little bonus.
Harkless is hardly the first to be incentivised in precise fashion. . .
Davis also entered the final game of the season with his bonus in reach. In a sign of how poor the LA Clippers were heading into the 2009- 10 campaign, Davis would earn $ 1 million if he played in 70 games and his team won 30. The guard easily ticked the first box but finished on an agonising 29 wins.
This one was a little less achievable. Foyle was a 13- season journeyman, finishing with career averages of 4.1 points and 4.7 rebounds per game. But the Orlando Magic still encouraged him to shoot for the stars in 2007, offering him an extra $ 1 million if he won the MVP. He did not.
Before he was a professional Internet troll, Schilling was a decent baseball pitcher — and a bit of a chubby one. So much so that, when he was re- signed by the Boston Red Sox in 2008, his contract included an extra $ 2 million if he made weight at six random checks. That’s a lot of Dunkin’ Donuts, so Schilling obliged.