‘We should not be burying our children’
Grieving dad blames meth as he mourns latest loss in family
"He wanted help but he couldn’t get help, he couldn’t find help."
Ron Gray
‘It all started with meth.” These are the words of a grieving father who lost his son in a car crash in central Rotorua this week — the second family tragedy he has suffered after losing another son and that son’s mother in another road smash.
Jared Gray died after his car hit a tree at about midnight on Monday. A police spokesman said yesterday an investigation into the crash was ongoing.
Ron Gray, in an interview with the Rotorua Daily Post Weekend, talked about his 35-year-old son’s life, saying Jared was a ”hearty young fella” but one who had battled a meth addiction.
“I want this to be something people learn from,” Gray said.
“He was a hearty worker but he got sick. The P made him sick.”
He hoped the suffering he and his family had endured would help send a message to others about the dangers of P.
“I hope this will be a lesson to all those young ones out there that are touching the methamphetamine. All you people selling it — you fellas are ruining our lives, our young ones’ lives, by selling this stuff . . . It has to stop.”
Jared was a popular man who made friends wherever he went, Gray said.
Tragically, this was not the first time Gray has had to say farewell to a son early. “It rips your guts out,” he said.
“This is the second son I’ve lost. My first son, he and his mother got killed in ’82, a logging truck hit them on the Waipa corner after dropping me off for work.
“Now my second son, I lose him . . . For me, my bloodline stops, I have no more bloodline. I carry our name, my son was the next one but now that bloodline has cut off. It’s over, I have no more.”
He said Jared had been eager to rehabilitate but his pleas for help often went unheard.
“He was screaming out for help. “He wanted help but he couldn’t get help, he couldn’t find help. We, as a family, tried to help but our system lets us down.”
Gray said he was feeling for Jared’s mother, who flew home to Rotorua from Canberra, Australia, this week to say farewell to her son.
“They were really close,” he said. “Jared lived with her and his nan when he was over there. I feel really sorry for her, that she has to fly home to this.
“P is no good. It ruins lives, it ruined Jared Gray and he’s only a young man.”