Woman’s Day (New Zealand)

IF IT’S SOMEONE YOU CARE ABOUT FACING CANCER HERE ARE SOME TIPS:

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Understand­ably, people can feel unsure about what they can do in this situation. They don’t want to intrude and they don’t know what is appropriat­e. But remember your friend or family member is still the same person you know and love, so don’t be frightened to make contact.

Make contact

Drop them a note, email, text, social media post, tweet or phone message as soon as you can by whatever means is best for you both. Offer to help, but don’t be pushy about rushing around to see them. Keep in touch on their terms.

When you visit

Let them talk about their concerns and be prepared to listen. Your role is not to be a fixer, so resist giving advice. It may be that they will prefer to talk about everyday things, so try to sense theirh i mood d and be guided by it. Keep your medical opinions to yourself unless you are a profession­al.

Respect their wishes

Whatever they want, try to go along with it – even if you don’t fully agree. Practical help can be a godsend. Making meals, driving, babysittin­g, housework and gardening will mostly be really appreciate­d by a sick person. Do beb aware thath some people find it hard to ask for help, so don’t be shy about offering.

Gifts

Receiving a small gift or perhaps a bunch of flowers can lift someone’s spirits when they are undergoing treatment. It really is the thought that counts, so there is no need to buy lavish gifts.

Financial help

Personal costs often increase at these times. If someone’s budget is tight, things like hospital parking, transport costs, away-from-home accommodat­ion and childcare can add greatly to a family’s stress. If it is appropriat­e, you may be able to pay for some of these costs. However, this will need to be handled sensitivel­y.

Don’t forget their partner

While most of the focus will be on the person with cancer, the person caring for them shouldn’t be overlooked. They may also be going through a difficult time and the caring suggestion­s listed here can equally apply to them. Also, keep in mind that cancer treatment can be a lengthy process so it’s important to keep in touch as time passes.

 ??  ?? Don’t be afraid – your friend is still the same person.
Don’t be afraid – your friend is still the same person.

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