Bury the hatchet or exert your revenge?

The saying ‘to err is human, and to forgive is divine’ does not always apply in real life. Not everybody is open to forgiving someone who has wronged them. LifeXtra takes a look at varying views about the issue.

Life is not exactly black and white. There are lots of grey areas. But the truth is that it is not always easy to forgive. You may forgive but will you forget? Is it possible to completely forgive and forget a wrong done to you and move on like nothing happened? I think it totally depends on the gravity of what has been done. Let us see what Nigerians think about this matter.

Nelson Brown, 25-year-old photographer who lives in Lagos, told LifeXtra that he doesn’t have a problem with forgiving people. “I have a really soft heart and when it comes to forgiving people, I do not find it hard to do so at all. There was a time the lady I was dating at the time cheated on me with a very good friend of mine. Although I was hurt, very hurt in fact; I didn’t hold it against them. I forgave them and moved. We later started talking, the three of us. It wasn’t like before but I forgave them. That is me for you. I don’t hold grudges. I just let things go,” he said.

Fourty eight-year-old Hajiya Aminat Rahman, a Kano-based trader, told LifeXtra that she has no reason not to forgive people when they offend her because Allah is all forgiving. She said, “I have no right to hold a grudge against my fellow human being. If Allah forgives me of all my sins when I pray to him, why should I not forgive another person? He is all merciful and forgiving. My life is a depiction of his life so I have to try my best to be like him. No matter how hard that may be. Trust me, it is not easy but Allah gives me the strength to and I pray he will continue to give me the strength to forgive people who sin against me.

So, yes, I will bury the hatchet rather than exert my revenge.”

Esther Ejiofor, a 32-year-old content writer, told LifeXtra that she will forgive depending on what was done to her. She said, “Well, people talk about forgiving like it is that easy. There are some things that someone would do to you and you just will not know how to react. I will forgive if it is something I can forget and get over. I will not pretend to forgive anyone because I’m scared of being judged. I will exert my vengeance because sometimes it is good to give people a taste of their own medicine. That way they will learn to treat others with love and care.”

Kunle Farukanmi, 28-yearold entrepreneur, said it depends on the gravity of the offence. “I don’t think anyone has offended me to the extent of me wanting to hurt them or pay them back in their own coin. Most times, it is better to leave people and let karma do what is right; I believe in karma a lot. What goes around surely comes around, so, I will neither forgive nor revenge. Life will do my dirty work for me,” he said.