The classwork that changed her students forever

The following story was widely shared on the internet. Sadly, I don’t know its author. The story may even be apocryphal but it is a simple exercise that any parent or teacher can employ to immediately improve and mend relationships at home and in the classroom. As for me, I’m eager to implement it at home with my wife and children. I recommend you do the same. As a teacher, I’m still kicking myself for not thinking about this simple strategy. Enjoy.

In a certain school, Mrs Alabi, a social studies teacher asked her students to list the names of the other students in the class on two sheets of paper leaving a space between each name.

She then told them to think of the nicest thing they could say about each of their classmates and write it down under their name.

It took the students the remaining time of the social studies class to finish the classwork.

Before leaving the class, she asked each of them to hand in their sheets.

That Saturday, Mrs Alabi went home with the sheets and wrote down the name of each student on a separate sheet of paper and listed what everyone else had written about each of the students.

When she came on Monday, she gave each student a sheet containing all the nice things other students had written about him or her.

Before long, the entire class was smiling. ‘Really?’ she heard them whispering to themselves.

‘I never knew that I meant anything to anyone!’ and, ‘I didn’t know others liked me so much,’ were most of the comments.

After that day, she didn’t know if they discussed it after class or with their parents, but it didn’t matter. The exercise had accomplished its purpose. The students were happy with themselves and one another.

Eventually, that set of students graduated from school and started life.

Several years later, one of the students who had joined the army was killed in a war and Mrs Alabi attended the funeral of that special student.

She had never attended the funeral of a serviceman before. Even in death, he looked so handsome, calm and mature.

The place was packed with his friends, and one by one those who loved him were allowed to take a walk around his casket to pay their last respect.

Mrs Alabi was the last person to take a walk and pray for the peaceful repose of his soul.

As she stood there, one of the soldiers who acted as pallbearer came up to her and asked her: ‘Were you Sani’s teacher?’ She nodded: ‘Yes.’ Then he said: ‘Sani talked about you a lot.’

After the funeral, Sani’s former classmates who were there gathered.

Sani’s mother and father were also there, obviously waiting to speak with his former teacher.

‘We want to show you something,’ his father said, taking a wallet out of his pocket.

“They found this on Sani

when he was killed. We thought you might recognize it.”

Opening the wallet, he carefully removed two worn pieces of notebook paper that had been taped, folded, and refolded many times.

Mrs Alabi knew without looking, that the papers were the ones on which she had listed all the good things each of Sani’s classmates had written about him.

“Thank you so much for doing that,” Sani’s mother said. “As you can see, Sani treasured it.”

Hearing that, Ajah, who shared the same seat with Sani smiled rather sheepishly and said, ‘I still have my list. It’s in the top drawer of my desk at home.’

Patricks’s wife who represented her husband, Sani’s former classmate said,

“Patrick asked me to put his in our wedding album.”

‘I have mine too,’ Rashidi said. ‘It’s in my diary’

Then Inipami, another classmate, reached into her handbag, took out her purse and showed her worn and frazzled list to the group. “I carry this with me at all times,” Inipami said and without batting an eyelash, she continued: “I think we all saved our lists.”

That’s when the teacher finally sat down and cried. She cried for all the beautiful memories they shared with Sani and for all his friends who would never see him again.