Limitation of greed in the new year of golf

We need not over-sing like Tu Face ‘African Queen’. The truth is golf is huge. The game is sweeter than hamburger. It’s the only game that pushes football to the dead-end. Doubt this? You need not to. Just allow your mind drift to the life of that Argentine idol, Lionel Messi’s real worth?

Well, let’s throw you a freebie, golf is the biggest earner, Tiger Woods, will be reaching the billion dollar mark by nest year. Breathe in an out before you hear this. This will be the first time in the history of the mark by next year. Again, this will be the first time in the history of the world sport that a human will be fetching such intimidating sum.

I know how the mind of cynics read. Some of those reading this are already in huge debate akin to those ‘egunje’ debates in the Niger Delta. I believe I have got such a fascinating mind drift and I can indeed hear something from one of those reading this. What I heard? Well, someone there is wondering how golf could be bigger than football. The other fellow is asking if golf could pack as much crowd as football; yet another fellow reading this is imagining if golf is actually decent. Then, this minute, I could hear another folk sneering with so much hate before uttering these words in acid… that golf is a game for the ‘idle rich’ billionaires. You guys are all wrong.

Golf packs more crowd than you see in a football World Cup final. Are you flaring up already? Don’t. Just browse on a gist the Master at Augusta International in Georgia, Atlanta. This is an annual golf event that packs more crowds than what you see in football matches. This is no exaggeration.

How decent the game of golf is? This one is easy to answer. Now cross your heart. Golf is the only game in the world where an arbiter is not required. In golf, you are your own arbiter. You record your own score. And you dare not cheat.In football, for instance, cheating is an artwork reserved for the ‘genius’. Footballers dive for the fun of it. And the referees are so dumb they issue red cards and penalties for such game play.

We are back to golf where you dare not cheat. It you attempt ‘diving’ here, you are banned for life. Not just from the game, but every tiny places of your life. Nobody will want to do business with you. Those who love you will detest you. A suitor will no longer pick your calls. And if she hears your voice from a phone booth, she will bang the phone that hard you would think you are a victim of a Taliban rocket joke. Reason? You have cheated on the golf course. It is that bad.

And this issue about golf being a game for the ‘idle-rich’, please dump it. You could be surprised that even if you are so poor that you can’t rub two ‘ten-naira’ notes together, golf will still have a space for you. The truth is golf, like death, is a leveler. It is the only game where you see details of a President or Governor being confined to the car park while the ‘ogas’ are moving onto the fairway. Come so the golf course and you will see the former Senate President, David Mark cracking jokes with every commoner he meets. Come around and you will see the nation’s former scribe, Babagana Kingibe greeting you before you could recollect if you have seen him on telly lately.

Everybody is on the golf course. Even the caddies who carry the burden of golfers are allowed time to play the game. And the equipment for the game will never bore holes in your hip pocket. The game is cheap enough that you could afford a golf set that won’t cost above N80,000. And this is an equipment you could use before the earth wears out.

You are asking about membership of a golf club and I just know. Well, all I can say here is that you dare not move to IBB Club in Abuja and Ikoyi Golf Club in Lagos if you are not earning something close to what Globacom’s Adenuga earns per second. But don’t be depressed just yet. There are about some 60 golf clubs in Nigeria and most of them would admit you even if you don’t earn a wage that could feed a dog.

Well, I got a lift to write this when a unanimous fellow put in a text through my phone. The fellow was direct enough. The fellow wrote that golf was a winner any day but major investors would not put money into it because we are too greedy in this country. The fellow added that foreign investors are scared of putting money in golf because they believe such funds could end up in private deep pocket.

The fellow is right and believe him.

How was your Christmas? A joyful new year I wish you. I