Thoughts on identity

The Olympics have come and gone, and infuriatingly, I have stumbled upon Naija articles and WhatsApp group chats sharing articles about “Nigerian” athletes who won medals for “other countries.” I always find it fascinating that for a people who welcome and celebrate foreigners who become Nigerian (acting even more Naija than those of us born and raised in Nigeria), we tend to strongly dislike anyone with Naija heritage claiming to be from somewhere else. You know what people? What’s good for the goose is good for the gander. You cannot celebrate the oyibo women (and men in some cases) you do as “full Naija,” and then turn around and decide that anyone with a Naija name playing for their country of choice/birth is a sellout and is really “Nigerian.” It’s not just our athletes.

At a function in Belgium a long time ago, I recall someone talking rather disparagingly about a Nigerian ‘friend’ of hers married to a Belgian who spoke Flemish to her children, made Belgian dishes and was as Belgian – in the things she chose to do- as her husband was. “She thinks she’s oyibo,” this person sneered. I reminded this person that had her ‘friend’ been an Oyibo married to a Nigerian and successfully adopting (adapting to?) her husband’s culture, she’d have been applauded. Not just applauded. She’d have been venerated by the same folks castigating their Naija sister. Abi na lie? So, why are we unwilling to extend the courtesy we do to foreigners to our own people? I beg you, identity isn’t something to be forced on people. Folks decide and choose. It is not to be foisted upon others by people who have their own selfish motives. The “I” in identity stands for “I decide.”

I guess one of the reasons I remain passionate about this topic is that I remember how right wingers tried to discredit Obama’s Americanness and, therefore, his eligibility to run for presidency, claiming that he was from Kenya. He has a Kenyan name, they said. He’s not a real American, they said. Never mind that Obama’s never lived in Kenya and his experience of Kenya has always been that of a foreigner. He’s never denied his Kenyan heritage; he wears his name with pride – he didn’t try to turn Obama into O’Bama or whatever would have flattened its Africanness, but he also knows that he is American and lives that truth. Imagine the ridiculousness, had his father been Nigerian, of folks claiming that regardless of his lived experience, regardless of what he himself said, that he was truly Nigerian. When you start thinking like a right winger on identity and belonging, wahala dey.

I suppose part of the need to claim the athletes is to lessen our disappointment at not getting more than two medals in Tokyo. I too wish we had had a better outing. That we had returned with at least 10 like Kenya or 113 like the US (why not?). But we got two medals from athletes who did their best and deserve our accolades. It is disrespectful to them, in my opinion, to chase after these other ‘Nigerian’ athletes to bump up our medal count. Moreover, it is also disrespectful to, for instance, have an athlete categorically say “I have never been to Nigeria and, right now [2019], I don’t feel the need to go. I don’t even know the national anthem of Nigeria. My roots are in Africa and I don’t ignore them but I consider myself deeply Italian,” like Desalu Esosa did , and then to run a newspaper article like Premium Times did – while quoting him- with the headline, ‘Five ‘Nigerians’ Who Won Medals for Other Countries.’ As if that wasn’t bad enough, to go on to write that they (the athletes) could have represented Nigeria but ‘chose’ to do so for other countries. Dude just told you he’s Italian! He represented his country as did the other athletes listed there. When people tell you where they are from, listen to them. And respect it. It is not by force to be from a place just because your name or your parents come from there.

So many of us are raising kids with one or two Nigerian parents. Some of our children will probably never live in Naija. Some may never even visit. Some may adopt a hyphenated nationality and be at home in both Naija and their country of birth. Some may – like Obama- choose a single nationality and it need not be Naija. It is fine. It is okay that these western countries are being confronted with citizens whose last names have their etymologies in Naija. It is fine that a Desalu or an Ezeonu is Canadian or Italian or American. It will not be the end of Naija as a nation. It is right that they claim ownership of the country in which they were born or raised, where they are paying taxes and where they live. It is only in claiming full ownership that they can avail themselves of every opportunity open to citizens and can challenge anyone who questions their right to belonging in those spaces.

Let our children prosper where they scatter. Let them call home where they will. Maybe one day we will have a US president with a last name from one of Naija’s ethnic groups, and who is comfortable claiming Nigeria too. When that day comes, I’ll be flying the greenwhite-green flag and declaring them Naija but until then, let’s chill on claiming for Naija , people who have not claimed her for whatever valid reason.