WHEN I LOOKED IN THE MIRROR
Iguess we’ve all done and perhaps some of us, still do this. We look at ourselves and we have an idea of who we’d like to be. Sometimes, we look at someone else, be it him or her and we think, I want what they have and assume what they have is also good for us. We look at an advert or we go clothes shopping and we think of what the advert conjures up in our minds or how good that item of clothing would look on us. Please confess, we’ve all done it at different stages of our lives. Aspiration is a very good think but let we what aspire to or for, be good for us and let it be based on the right and firm foundation. I always remember 1974 and wearing a pair of high-wasted bell bottom corduroys, a striped brownish tank-top and to polish it off, a pair of black platform shoes as I attempted to watch Bruce Lee in ‘Enter the Dragon’. Shaft meets, I don’t know what! In my mind’s eye I looked ‘fly’ but clearly to the attendant who summarily threw me out, I looked a complete fool and nothing more than a mutant nuisance; the parody of a twelve year old trying to convince the ticket usher I was of the required age.
We all get it wrong from time to time as our teenage and young adult wardrobes show and it is only until we get into our late thirties, forties and most certainly by our fifties that we really begin to understand who we are and what we now need. As my late Father would always tell me, knowing who you really are can sometimes be a really scary prospect. The person who we actually are may be a far-cry from the person we think we are or the person who at twenty something we set out to be. Warts and all and stripped bare this is who we are and it’s a realisation that when we accept it, can actually be liberating and act as a catalyst for positive change. As individuals sometimes we have to accept the need to change or to recalibrate our life if we are ever to stand a chance of achieving what it is we want to achieve in our short lives.
So nearing 58 years of age, can the same be said for a nation or put differently, the peoples who collectively, make up a nation? Presumably, when we look around the world, slogans such as ‘Yes We Can’ resonate because they are essentially underpinned by a generational understanding that this is who we are and it may fall short of who we would like to be and where we, collectively, feel we need to be. Mine is a simple and humble question and in no way a statement? Whatever your individual answer maybe, it merits thinking about.
Like several readers of This Day Style, as Nigerians we like the prospect of travel. Travel is a good thing. I have been blessed and have travelled and travelled far and wide both in a professional capacity and also in a family capacity. Be it the Americas, the African Continent, Australia, the Caribbean, Eurasia, Europe, Far East, Middle-East, and the Polynesian Islands, one thing I have taken from all this travel and coming into contact with peoples of different colours, religions, perspectives, cultures and genders is that after a while of seeing people operating in their own environments, you simply conclude that people are intrinsically all the same. We all have the same issues wherever we are in the world. We worry about life, we worry about who are. We worry about relationships, careers, paying our bills, educating our children, providing shelter, looking after our parents and looking after our planet. We worry about being productive, we worry about being of relevance in our own community and all over the world, and from cradle to grave, be you rich or be you poor, we all strive to chart a path that can bring us a modicum of happiness before the very small part we play on life’s stage is up. Aspiration is a good thing.
My generation very much mirrors the hopes and aspirations of ‘Independence Parents’. These parents, collectively worked hard and sacrificed so much to educate their children both at home and abroad. They were buoyed by this incredible sense of optimism and euphoria and they were clear in their vision, that their hard work and sacrifice was a means to a deliberate end. This deliberate end would be the uplift of their children. These children to whom so much would be given would one-day seize the mantle and the reins and have the courage to play their part in Nigeria. Simply put, these same children would justify the sacrifice and investment of time, money and love their parents had made so that they can be the best they can and in so being, ensure that their Nigeria experience is brought closer to the best parts of their global experiences as they work to create a society where the various skills they have acquired can best be deployed and deployed for the betterment of their Nigeria.
For too long on my travels I have heard the same thing said time and time again. ‘You’re Nigerian?’ ‘You guys have so much potential’. ‘You’re blessed with so many resources’. ‘Oil, minerals, fertile land, sun’. ‘You’ve got so many talented young people’. When I first heard that in 1988 I felt pumped up. First day on the new job, to hear that from my then new Boss, I thought yes! It is true, Nigeria is truly a beacon of potential and a standout example of an African nation on a global stage. Fast – forward to 2017 and having travelled severally to Malaysia, Indonesia, South Korea, Singapore and China, I am now look at myself in the mirror and wonder when that question is popped to me again, where should I put my face.
I am not sure. Is it me being too ambitious or is the Nigeria I experience today in my fifties falling far short of the Nigeria I thought I would have at this stage when I was in my twenties? Was I too ambitious for Nigeria back then? Is that in itself a controversial statement or is a statement of fact? I would love to hear other people’s points of view.
Yes, we have no doubt made strides as a nation state and the fact that we enjoy this democracy being the biggest one of all. We will continue to make strides but (for me at least) the fundamental question is, when I look at my score card in a game where I have been blessed to start the second half, I ask myself how has my-generation played and how do we play our (required) part to fulfil the clear vision of our Independence Parents?
My late Father (may his soul rest in perfect peace), would always chide us before he passed on. ‘Who from your generation to whom so much has been given, when the time is right, will have the courage and the where-with- all to stand up and fight with all of his or her heart and might to make the Nigeria experience closer to that experience for which we and thousands like us have been educated for?’
Today that imperative of my Father’s question, seems greater than ever and it hangs like a sword of Damocles for those of us now playing the second half of life’s ball game. Today, even those in the village can see with the press of a button through their smart phones the best part of experiences around the world. That should galvanise the need particularly in my generation to ensure that we can deploy our collective skills and merits to ensure that our children’s Nigerian experience is something better than we, children of Independence Parents enjoyed and perhaps took for granted as a given?
Again, mine is a simple and humble question and in no way a statement.
Remember, we must help our youth the truth to know, in love and honesty to grow and living just and true, great lofty heights attain, to build a nation where peace, and justice shall reign.
Happy New Year
As individuals sometimes we have to accept the need to change or to recalibrate our life if we are ever to stand a chance of achieving what it is we want to achieve in our short lives. So nearing 58 years of age, can the same be said for a nation or put differently, the peoples who collectively, make up a nation?