FAT SHAMING

(WEEK 17)

Recap and vital statistics:

I am 5 feet and 10 inches tall and 60 years old.

I was super-slim till about 10 years ago, then gradually got fat.

I started this weight loss programme on March 16th when I weighed a whopping 120kg and measured 49-47-51 (chest-waisthips) inches.

By last Sunday, my weight had dropped to 109.5kg.

This week, I’m down to 107.5kg. And I’m smugly patting myself on the back because after weeks of mostly half-hearted dieting and hardly ever exercising, I’ve managed to get myself into a kick-ass, no-nonsense frame of mind; and the 2-kilos-in-7-days drop I’ve enjoyed this week is the best result I’ve achieved since the earliest days of my weight loss odyssey (in week 1, I lost 2.5kg. Ditto week 2).

My GP told me, when I was 120kg, that I needed to lose “at least 40kg”. But he’s English, which means that he thinks it’s OK for sexuagenarian women to look like stockfish and wear bikinis in public, so I’m listening to purse-lipped Naija advisors who have urged me to ignore “Oyinbo standards” and set my sights a bit lower!!!

I’m therefore aiming for a total loss of 35kg that will bring my weight down to 85kg. Which means that I still have 22.5kg to lose.

It isn’t going to be easy. But, as I said on this page last week:

Weight loss is a MENTAL challenge because once you have made your mind up to be serious, the physical challenges linked to dieting (occasional hunger pangs, cravings for banned fattening favourite foods) and exercising (aches and pains) don’t bother you much. And I’ve finally made my mind up to be serious. I didn’t follow any fancy famous dietary regime last week. I just completely avoided sugar and sipped my way through several mugs of foreign-style, oil-free vegetable soups - containing ingredients like broccoli, cauliflower, carrots, peas, lentils and courgettes – per day

I also allowed myself avocados, mangos, pineapple slices, bananas and ube (the purple-skinned, greenfleshed fruit that Igbos call “pear” and eat with corn, though I skipped the corn because I was trying to keep carbohydrates to an absolute minimum).

Sweet and/or creamy fruits like all of the above are pretty high in calories, but are packed with healthy nutrients and won’t do any damage to the waistline if eaten in modest quantities.

Interestingly, despite my food consumption having dropped by 80%, I didn’t feel hungry or suffer from yearnings for forbidden foods.

But I had a calculated “lapse” because I have concluded that having one “cheat” day a week makes diets more sustainable.

Relentless deprivation is bad for the soul; and if you give yourself permission to eat and un-guiltily enjoy whatever you most desire once a week, you’ll have something to look forward to and are less likely to abandon ship in frustration and revert to full-time gluttony.

Last Wednesday was my cheat day; and the dish I chose was okazi (afang) soup, that sublime indigenous delicacy. Mine was packed with stockfish, dried fish, snails, kpomo, beef. And I still salivate and smile at the memory of the sheer, unalloyed pleasure it gave me!

Exercise also took a front seat last week (for a change) as I dragged myself, almost kicking and screaming, out of Couch Potato mode (my lifelong default setting, alas) and started to do daily yoga sessions, using as my guide a 6am class that is screened on DSTV Channel 178.

The classes comprise various beautiful, lithe, feline young lady instructors and demonstrators prancing around in stylish sportswear and telling viewers how to stretch their limbs and arrange them into contortions that look intimidating but are do-able if you try.

The TV yoga girls cheer me up because there is something uplifting about observing vibrant energy and youth in action. And they make me believe that even though I’m old enough to be their mum, I too can make the most of my body and turn it into a welloiled machine.

Next on the agenda is 30 minutes of strength training, using dumbells and a Harvard Medical School exercise manual.

Then I do some chair cardio (using You Tube videos as guides) to burn fat and strengthen my cardiovascular system (heart, etc).

Sadly, I cannot currently do normal cardio exercises that require standing for long periods of time because my knees are fragile.

My knees are less painful now than they were when I was heavier; and I’m told that they will continue to become stronger and stronger as more and more fat melts off my overburdened frame.

I cannot wait for this to happen because, trust me dear Readers, chair cardio is SO boring compared to going for a brisk walk in an attractive area or doing vigorous aerobic class moves or dancing like a delighted dervish to great golden oldies from my 1970s heydey.