LEGAL HUMOUR

When you know you must really be drunk

A man sat down at a bar, looked into his shirt pocket and ordered a double scotch.

A few minutes later, the man again peeked into his pocket and ordered another double. This routine was followed for some time, until after looking into his pocket, the man told the bartender he’d had enough.

The bartender said, "I’ve got to ask you. What’s with the pocket business?"

"Oh," said the man, "I have my Lawyer’s picture in here, and when he starts to look honest, I know I’ve had enough."

Seashore with family

A Doctor was vacationing at the seashore with his family.

Suddenly, he spotted a fin sticking up in the water and fainted.

"Darling, it was just a shark," assured his wife when he came to.

"You've got to stop imagining that there are Lawyers everywhere."

Newest Horror Movie

Have you seen the current remake of the movie "Cape Fear?"

It's about a deranged psychotic who is seeking revenge against a Lawyer.

The question is, while watching the movie, for whom do you root?

A Cold Winter Night

Lorenzo Dow, an evangelist of the last century, was on a preaching tour, when he came to a small town one cold winter's night.

He entered the local general store to get some warmth, and saw the town's Lawyers gathered around the pot-bellied stove, discussing the town's business. Not one offered to allow Dow into the circle.

Dow told the men who he was, and that he had recently had a vision where he had been given a tour of Hell, much like the traveller in Dante's Inferno.

When one of the Lawyers asked him what he had seen, he replied, "Very much what I see here: All of the Lawyers, gathered in the hottest place."