LOUD WHISPER

Over the last week, I was invited to tea by no other than the very distinguished former diplomat and personal friend to the Queen of England, Chief Emeka Anyaoku. My people, I no sleep o. I did not even know what to wear to the meeting. I started practicing how to drink the tea sef, you know this Oga is not a small one o. A man who defeated four foreign Heads of Government to emerge Secretary General of the Commonwealth, a man who replaced the Duke of Edinburgh as the President of the WWF and a man who was so close to Nelson Mandela. This no be where I will now carry my Shomolu manners to. So I immediately called a select committee of my people to discuss the invite with a view to reaching an acceptable position that would see me better represent the very good people of Shomolu. This to us was a meeting with Her Majesty the Queen of England who by the way is a distant cousin of the Duke of Shomolu through the duke’s maternal great Grandmother, who waved at the Queen when she came visiting as a young girl. So, it was agreed that I would wear a suit and Bowtie, I will sit to his left hand side and cross my legs, keeping them crossed from the beginning to the end. I will not ask for more sugar in my tea and I will refuse an offer for lunch so that I don’t upset my tummy and then run to the loo. I took all these resolutions to heart and met with Chief Anyaoku. He was very pleasant and looked strikingly handsome at 80. He received us with warmth and led us to his drawing room. That is what they call it o. They don’t draw there my people, they just sit there and have tea. The tea came and they asked if I wanted more sugar, I crossed my leg, looked straight into the butler’s eyes and said no! I tell you, I represented Shomolu people well. Discussions were exciting and deep, moving from his emergence as Commonwealth Head honcho through his meetings with Mandela, Abacha and the Eminent Peoples group which put pressure on Apartheid. At the end of the meeting, we exchanged books, that’s what diplomatic dignitaries do and we bade each other farewell to the tune of the Shomolu National Anthem. That was a visit. Thank you sir, worthwhile experience.