Come on, Let’s Change Tactics!
Let me quickly send my thanks and appreciation to the people who arrested revolution man on Saturday morning. If they had come for him later in the day, then I just would have been caught in the wahala. Mbok where I for run to? Me Ibibio man wey no get stake in Nigeria? We don’t even have SAN. The only SAN we have get EFCC problem, the man carry him gorimapa head go enter trouble with EFCC. Where would I have run to, who would I have called? Me that cannot even spell revolution talk less of painting bridge? I for cry o. I for beg the DSS people that they should please allow me write my will before we go. I for beg them to allow me carry some of the Afang and then that they should allow me use the toilet before we move. The kind of fear that is still catching me, I cannot even begin to explain o. I would have stripped and begged them that it is devil o, that Buhari can be life President and that I will serve him till I die. Mbok, what is bad governance, what is corruption, are we worse than Brazil? I would have really begged o. You see, me I don’t like all that kind of relationship – EFCC, DSS, Police, LASTMA, Boys Brigade, Fire Brigade, Guguru defence all that kind people, I don’t want their trouble o. My daughters will not even marry within their ranks. In fact when they are passing on the road, I will just cross and go to the other side. I am not any activist o, I do not even believe in freedom of speech, please take it away, just give me my Afang.. Kai, me and DSS? God forbid. In fact when I drive pass the front of their office in Shangisha, I used to tell the driver to stop and I will come down and enter the bush and crawl on my belly the way they do in American film and pass before I enter my car again. I very far from their problem o. Na him Sowore and that his Bassey Okon hairstyle want to come and give me BP because of what?
That said, I will like to just even advise my lords of the black small. You see let us try and change with the times. These are digital times; all these Abacha-type style no dey work again. Shey you see that people except a few like me no longer fear arrest again na. You see the way they are shouting and jumping around shouting like the small girl who was flogged for not having school fees – ‘dem go arrest us tire, how many dem want arrest’. So let’s move with the times, it’s not every little Sowore that jump and shout revolution that we will now be sending SWAT team with all these gadgets to go and pick him up. Revolution wey no pass him bedroom? Apart from it being waste of state resources and underutilization of the highly trained supermen, it really does nothing for the government image. Instead, I think we should start engaging them the way Russia is doing to America. They realized that they are no longer a superpower in the traditional way so they moved into cyber space and continue the fight there. My take dear DSS is to leave all these cowboy moves and start to engage these ‘traitors’ on their own grounds. Let’s go digital, let’s be much more circumspect and you will see that apart from it being less costly it would be more effective.
You see all this my advice na make una no suddenly remember say una forget somebody o. I don run o, no vex.